A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My best friend is a girl, and we get along real well and are perfect for one another emotionally, but physically, I'm not at all attracted to her.But when we're in public together we look like a couple because we're so close.We're not affectionate with 1another, but when together in public I feel bad as though I'm disrespecting her when I look at someone else, or when I find someone attractive, I feel as though i can't look, I feel bad for looking at them, thinking that it's disrespecting her, or if someone sees me looking or making eyes at someone else, it'll look like i'm a scum bag with her next to me, flirting with someone else when others might think we're a couple, and problem is we never get hit on coz people think we're an item.What do I do? I know I've repeated myself a bit, thanks
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female
reader, jabey +, writes (6 February 2007):
why,if you two are just good friends would it be disrepectful to look at other women. When I am out with a good male friend, we will eye up the opposite sex for each other. Also I think we give of the vibes we are just mates.
The thing is do you go out together just for a casual drink on the knowledge that both of you would like to pull. if so there is nothing wrong with joining forces in this to both of your advantage, I mean sometimes she could even strike up conversation with a woman for you and bring into conversation very early on that you two are purely just mates. If you did chat someone else up yourself and worry that they think you are a sumbag, again bring into conversation very early on that you are out with your close mate. |In this day and age most people will understand that.
I get a little impression from your note I could be way off the mark , but is it that you think your friend likes you more than just a friend. Because i really think that if you were cool pals this really would not be an issue. if Im out with a male friend, i would never feel disrespected if he eyed up women, i would encourage him.And vice versa.
Good luck
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