A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I have this boyfriend, I've been with him almost five monthsand we have a bit a LOT of fights.We're kinda in a tight situation because my mom hates him because of something that happened, and he won't let me go to his house ( yeah, i know) so we have this relationship when it's practicallyat malls and friends house.. He won't let me go to his house because and I quote " It's fuckin' poor.." like, I just want to be alone with him.I'm not like the f ing house inspector or anything.it's the worst :( well of course it's great to be spending time together but the fact that that's where we've been together for the past four months it's kinda getting on my nerves.I'm sixteen, and so is my boyfriend. He's the definition of immature.. and I'm not even close. He puts himself down, he makes ME feel bad about what he says about himself, he mumbles and then doens't repeat what he says, he's insecure, HE WON'T EVEN LET ME SEE HIM WITHOUT A SHIRT ON, he thinks that i think he's ugly, he thinks that I think he's 'a fuck up of a boyfriend', I ALWAYS have to make the first move, always. And when I tell him I don't like it, he just doesn't listen or change anything about it.People ask me what are the positive things about him and honestly, all I can say is that I have fun with him ( not physcially since we're not having sex unfortunately.. ) and that he makes me happy.Well, he makes me happy when he isn't being such an idiot.Of course I love him for who he is, but I can't help the fact that he ignores my feelings and doesn't listen to a thing I say, literly.What's something I could do to make him realize that this is driving me crazy/ to snap out of it? We've spoken about it OVER 20 times and nothing's changed.I know there's so many negatives about our relationship,but what can you do about someone you have so much feelings for but then again they don't have a clue how to act?I know 2 year olds more mature than him..I know this is really confusing, but I'm pretty much stuck in what to do.Thanks for your help! 3
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immature, insecure, self esteem Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you so much (: xx
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (16 January 2010):
Sometimes, people are so wrapped up in their own lives, for good or for bad, that there is no room for others. Your boyfriend is one of these people. Now I know you love him, and I know you don't want to hear this, but you need to let him go. He's dragging you down with him, and that's not fair. Before anyone can be in a good relationship, they need to be mature enough and secure enough with themselves, and your boyfriend just isn't that. He's not a bad guy, he's just a guy who needs to work his own problems out before he can be a good boyfriend. You need to move on for your own sake. Because in ten years time, he may not have changed and you'll be even more unhappy about it all.
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