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anonymous
writes: My husband of 10 years has this thing about talking to young girls ages 15 through 18 online and I think it is somewhat of an obsession. I personally do not think it is normal. I don’t understand what he gets out of instant messaging these girls. I have caught him, sending messages to these girls, viewing their web cams, and even pleasuring himself, all without him knowing of course. I’ve brought this up to him once before and he assured me that it was nothing, he didn’t know why he did it and he would stop. It seems as though he stopped for a while, but I know he’s back to his old ways. In my book we are happily married and are still fully satisfied sexually with one another. I don’t mind him watching a porno, reading Playboy or anything like that. I really don’t care if he is looking online at porn. I guess it’s just the fact that he is actually talking to girls and communicating with them online and I really don’t see the difference in that verses picking up the phone. I almost feel like this is somewhat of an affair. I’m not sure if I’m getting worried over something that is harmless or is it? Am I blowing this out of proportion, is this something that most 35 year old men like to do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2008): hello,im a 12 year old girl yet i have extremely good answers for this my suggestion would be to check out his messages and if hes doing something odd on webcam then you should be worried or find out if these girls even know how old he is and talk to him about it if he doesnt stop you should inform someone.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2005): wow! good on him
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2005): Hey, I am 15!My old best mate's dad was a bit of a funny man, I hated being alone with him. He always flirted and said extremely unnesserary things to me!! He always use to ring me and text. I tried ignoring it but it didn't work. I had to get the police involved.Though your hubby may not be doing this I still think it is wrong for him to talk to 15 year olds especially. I would have a word or log his conversations on line and read his texts. I'm sorry but this is not right.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2005): You need to sit your husband down and ask why he does it. You need be careful as it is the teenage girls that he is chatting to very close to the edge here. Is he just doing it as a thrill? something to make him feel better ? after all some young girls do like the older man! I wouldnt say that its cheating, but then its not what men should be doing when they are married, if he loves you and cares for you why is he doing it ? is he simply getting an ego boost ? or is he indeed tempted to meeting up with young girls ? the risk is that he will get too carried away and meet up with them and you need to stop it before it gets that far. Do sit and talk to him and explain your concerns, and see if maybe you can see a way forward to him stopping, let him know that you care for him and that you love him and that you are prepared to help him, but he must stop chatting to real young girls as its affecting your marraige and you need him more than they do. Put it in such a way that your not comdemming him, but care for him and want to help undertand him. Maybe if he cant stop counselling may help. this could just be a phase, but either way you do need to let him know you care and that you want to understand.Hope this helpsTake care Agony AuntSpaz[email address blocked]
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2005): You need to sit your husband down and ask why he does it. You need be careful as it is the teenage girls that he is chatting to very close to the edge here. Is he just doing it as a thrill? something to make him feel better ? after all some young girls do like the older man! I wouldnt say that its cheating, but then its not what men should be doing when they are married, if he loves you and cares for you why is he doing it ? is he simply getting an ego boost ? or is he indeed tempted to meeting up with young girls ? the risk is that he will get too carried away and meet up with them and you need to stop it before it gets that far. Do sit and talk to him and explain your concerns, and see if maybe you can see a way forward to him stopping, let him know that you care for him and that you love him and that you are prepared to help him, but he must stop chatting to real young girls as its affecting your marraige and you need him more than they do. Put it in such a way that your not comdemming him, but care for him and want to help undertand him. Maybe if he cant stop counselling may help. this could just be a phase, but either way you do need to let him know you care and that you want to understand.Hope this helpsTake care
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reader, wildblueroze +, writes (27 May 2005):
No, you're not blowing this out of propotion, he either needs to get help, or you need to leave, it isn't normal.
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reader, Wildberries +, writes (24 May 2005):
This is NOT normal and you should be concerned. But more so by the AGE of the young ladies involved. That is a VERY fine line he's walking and it has the potential to get him in BIG trouble. Watching sexual activity online and magazines is one thing, texting teenage girls that are under the age of consent is another especially given that he is "pleasuring" himself to their webcams. RED FLAGS should be going up ALL over the place ....
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