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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Dear Aunties:I have a close friend who I've known since university. He just turned 32 and he dates women who are much younger then him. Exclusively. They tend to be in the 18-22. Often he jokes around and pokes fun at himself for "liking them young". He treats them a bit like pets. He also tends to date at least two at once. He never seems satisfied with the one he has at the moment. He is always actively planning how to set something up with another one. He acts as if every girl is some sort of potential fantasy he can conquer if given the chance the right opportunity. I think he is proud he is a player.He is smart, ambitious, and entreprenurial. He seems serious about "settling down." He says he would like to buy a house, get married, and raise children...he says that is his goal someday. I believe he is sincere when he talks about these ambitions, but it seems so incongruous with the way he acts amongst women. I have warned him jokingly that if he keeps doing this he is going to turn into a creepy old man. It really stood out to me recently when he lusted after, but eventually lost interest in a girl who turned out to be 26. Apparently she is not in his "range."I usually tease him about this...but recently I find it hard not to be offended on some level. I'm not even sure what he gets out of it. Sometimes I get upset and tell him if anyone treated me the way he treats his "current" girlfriend, I would feel like shit. He becomes remorseful and guilty and says, "I can't explain it....18 to 22 year olds, that's my niche....I just feel like I always want to have one more last fling while I can." Sometimes, he brings up Woody Allen as a counterpoint to prove that his attraction to younger women isn't all that unusual. Any guys who have been here before who can explain this phenomenon? I don't have the best track record for relationships either, but at least I feel like I learn from my mistakes...or I end up wanting something more and different than what I've had before. I feel in his case, he might be avoiding something? Any guys been here before? I want to understand what his issue is.
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (14 January 2011):
 Haven't been there but he obviously likes younger flesh. Yes, he will marry and settle and have children and a house and a horse and pets and even a Nintendo Wii, but that is going to happen when he's like 40 and feels he's had enough girls.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2011): well im not a guy, but what i can see from this, is that your friend most likely has a poor self esteem or issues with his age which make him feel that he should date younger women to keep himself 'young'
the problem with this is, how long is he going to let himself behave like this. Dont get me wrong theres nothing wrong with him dating younger girls but to exclude all others for being over 22 is rediculous! He wants to start a family? Well im 22 and trust me i am a fair few years off from wanting children and marriage! So does he want to be chasing toddlers in his 40s? At some point he's gonna get to an age where the girls he is persuing are not going to be interested any more. In all honestly that sort of age gap doesnt always work out. I dated a 30yr old at 18and i drove him to distraction because i had young male friends from school and he couldnt bare it. Soin turn accused me of everything shall i say it didnt end well.
What im trying to say is all this misstreatment of young woman is gonna lead him to ruin. He may meet one girl that he wants to settle down with and she's gonna leave him coz she's too young and not ready. Your being a good friend and thats all u can do for him i think.
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