A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My mate who's 17 is going out with a 28 year old... She says they are very much in love. Should I accept it coz if I tell her to stop seeing him I know she'll just carry on.What can I do? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Say It Straight +, writes (14 June 2007):
What business is it of yours,
Sure if he's abusing her or in the isle of man she's under age or anything like that then step in but first think about it, in any relationship that breaks the mold especially age gap relationships the main problem always comes from those so called friends on the outside who dissaprove,
If they are as much in love as you say they are then all you are going to do is lose a friend,
Love is a funny thing it has no bounds, it crosses all race, colour and creed, and yes, even age, if she is happy then as a friend be happy for her.
This is your problem not her's, think hard, good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2007): Is he a contolling guy? Does it seem he calls all the shots? Is her parents okay with this? In a nutshell, you cannot do anything. Unless of course, the age of consent laws come into play here. Most places are 16, but some places are 18. If the parents aren't wild about this...this older guy would be very smart to wait just one year? And save himself a lot of grief and hassle. At 17, she is not a legal adult, totally dependant on her parents. I also have to wonder about a man who finds he has something in common with a 17 year old. They are both at very different life stages. Your friend is 17 years old and it's quite likely the idea of a 28 year old man liking her, seems irresistable to her. Maybe he has a car, a job and money. Is she looking for someone to look after her? what exactly is her home life like? I don't know your friend but usually in situations like this, it very likely this is not a 'real love'.it could be all about power and control. Quite often it is. To him a younger girl this age, could be be easier to deal with, but the reality is--if he could handle "real" relationships with a woman his own age and if he was socially mature-he wouldn't be giving a 17 year old, the time of day.
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