A
female
age
36-40,
*ircal
writes:I have been going out with my boyfriend for the past 3 years and we are happy to be together. I don’t have any issues with my bf but his mother (50) and sister (20). They are uncontrollable. When the mother and daughter get in to fights, they actually hit each other. Once in April the sister had almost killed the mother by trying to squeeze the neck. When my bf told me that I didn’t believe, until I saw the nail marks on her neck, the sister’s boyfriend dumped her a few weeks ago since she was physically hurting him and he couldn’t take it any more. My mother always tells me to break off this relationship saying that family is low class(even tho my boyfriend and his father is descent) but I don’t want to because we both love each other. I always kept my distance with the mother and daughter, knowing the personalities. Last Friday I saw a picture of his mother on face book so I called my bf and told him because the picture was not a good one. Some how at that time the mother was there and apparently she had over heard the conversation I had with her son. A while later she calls me (I was with some of my office friends at that time) and asks me about it. I got pissed off with my bf and I shouted at him for telling his mother everything that we talk. The biggest mistake I did was not keeping my big gap shout!! So I called her and shouted at her for listing to our conversation, she hang up me so I didn’t bother calling her again thinking it was over. Saturday morning this woman is sending me a text saying "who da fucks do u think u r? u have no rite 2 tell me what 2 do wit my life I do wat I want n if I want 2 go clubbing wit my daughter I will so mind ur own fucking business ok. I got rid of Shane it wont b that difclt for me 2 get rid of u too.” So in return I called her a bitch and told her if she can try to break us up… and it went on and on and I even called her a old bitch (since she’s so scared of getting old - which affected her big time).She told me not to step in to their house…… later that afternoon I felt bad for what I did, what ever said and done she was a mom, so I sent her a text saying I’m sorry. In return this woman is sending me a text saying you messed with the wrong mother and that she’ll get her daughter to hit me. In the night da daughter called and blasted me using all the filth and if she sees me on the road that she'll break my face.I was in a calm mood so I didn’t say a word. But I told this to my bf. And that god he took my side and shouted at then while I was on line. They have told my bf until he breaks up with me that they won’t talk to him. He was ok with it. But I’m scared… knowing the two characters….. will they try to break us off?? Please help me…..(what ever said and done my bf loves his mother) is there away to get rid of her?
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (15 September 2008):
 My, my, everyone is behaving badly here. Knowing your boyfriend's mother for what she is, you certainly were unwise to provoke her and call her names. Since it's your boyfriend's family he's stuck with them but you don't have to be. I agree with Uncle Phil (as usual) this is not a nice family and I think your relationship is going to be awfully bumpy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2008): Ask yourself what you want in the future. If you should end up marrying this guy you'll have these two characters for relatives for the rest of their lives. Do you really want that?
It's going to be a case of 'them or us' by the sound of it. I can't make any decision about that for you, you have to decide for yourself, but if he ever takes their side any relationship you might have with him will be doomed to failure because you'll be the outsider at war with the rest of them.
They don't sound like a very nice family to me if this is how they speak and behave and if you were my daughter I'd advise you to have nothing whatsoever to do with them because of the way they conduct their lives.
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