A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: hello,i need some advice please, i am ruining my relationship with my boyfriend with my mood swings. i always take things the wrong way even when i know hes only joking. if i txt him a few times and have no reply i start txting him stuff like why are you ignoring me? what have i done? take it you dont want to be with me anymore stuff like that. when he does reply he always tells me he hed no signal or was busy or whatever and always says sorry but because he ignored me in the first place im in a mood and cant get out of it and make things worse!! i dont have trust issues and know that hes telling the truth but still i go in a mood.i nit pick at little things too and cause arguments over nothing aswell but i dont know why? when i start txing nasty things he tells me im saying stuff that hes never said which is true but i feel like im only saying what he is thinking even though its rubishwhen i finally snap outta my mood could be hours or even days later i apolagize and put things right i promise not to do it again but then i do. its ruining my relationship, we are on a break at the mo as he says i need to sort my head out, i dont wanna lose him so please can someone help and show me how to prove i can stop??how do i stop this? i know im doing wrong but cant stop doing it?thanksc
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female
reader, Leannie +, writes (11 June 2010):
this sounds so much like me and the way i am is ruining my relationship too. there are so many issues and its all such a mess at the moment. my "boyfriend" wants a break and i think i have just pushed him to far over the past 2 years that he is now turn between the fact he loves me and the fact my behaviour is not "normal" and creates so many problems. people give me advise like just calm down, dont react, if it was that simple do you not think i would have done that already but its doesnt work, this problem is bigger than me and it takes over no matter what i have tried......vitamins, homeopathy, self help books, relaxation cds, distraction, councelling. i am now on a mission to sort this mess out in the hope my boyfriend will stay with me and we can have the relationship i so desperately want so i am trying accupunture, hypnotherapy, another set of councelling and am going to see my gp with regards to the pill to see if that isnt helping my mood swings. in a way its good to know that i am not the only person like this but i feel so sad that someone else is going through this coz i wouldnt wish it on anyone......
A
female
reader, ccaatt +, writes (26 July 2009):
I do exactly the same, im 27 recently been diagnosed with BPD and clothymia a mild form of bipolar Ive been with my bloke over a year and i feel so sorry for him, my mood swings are out of control, i do exactly the same as your saying, i text him something like you coming up tonight and he'l reply something like yes il see you later which is a completly normal response to my question and il reply saying but something like yeah but do you want to see me and il turn it into an arguement which can last all day and i dont even know why! I go on and on like a stuck record sometimes its like im just seeing how far i can push him again i dont why? I love this guy so much he is my best friend, he stood by me through my illness and everything but its like im intent on destroying it. It sounds crazy doesnt it i know im doing it but i cant stop :O( I want to stop :O( im so scared of losing him.Im not saying you have what i have but i know exactly how you feel. I know alot of how i am is down to my illness.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2009): I'd say you're insecure hun. You need to concentrate on yourself and not just on your boyfriend. Do things that make you happy and then it won't bother you if your boyfriend doesn't text you back immediatelly or he does things that annoy you. You'll have things that give you pleasure apart from your boyfriend so the little things won't matter that much.Also don't feel too bad about what you're doing. Getting over this is what growing up is really all about - we all have to do it. Well...should. Some people never grow up. :-)
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A
male
reader, Your friend +, writes (19 June 2009):
The moods and feelings are clearly out of your control and cannot be modified even when you are aware of them. These kind of extreme mood swings with feelings of paranoia need to be assessed at by a professional preferably a psychiatrist as you could be suffering from bi polar disease.
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