| A
female
age
36-40,
*onkeyboots
writes: good god!!i have had the weirdest couple of weeks ever!!!i met the most amazing amazing guy ever. i thought he was the one for me, he bought me flowers, drove 60 miles to see me at uni three times in 3 days,came to my house at 7 every morning to make me a cup of tea, text me all the time..i saw him yesterday with his GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!he didnt want to sleep with me, and i guess i kind of offered sex on a plate because he was so amazing, so firstly what did he want from me?he loves her yet if he wasnt using me for sex what did he want from me????also, i went round to tell the girl..have i made the right decision?she said she is so glad i told her-theyve been together for 6 months and he told her he wanted to marry her!!!im so confused at the moment and feel so used!!i know that she must be feeling worse but he told her i was lying and was just some slag who wanted him!!!i was insecure already, but this is really going to crush me.x x x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, sleepyhollow  +, writes (4 May 2007):
My advice is back off. If he has a girlfriend, he has a girlfriend. End of story.
As for your being friends with him, I'd advise a little break of a few months before doing so. It may be that he was in a position where he was scared about settling down, but not crazy enough to actually cheat on his girlfriend.
Most likely, he was just proving to himself that he still had that "thing" that drives a girl wild. Men, myself included, like to know that we're desirable to other women, even if we don't ever act on it or feel the desire to act on it. It just feels good to know that women besides your girlfriend, wife, etc. like you.
It may sound screwy but women are that much different. Most of them seem to like being admired by other men, and especially envied by other women.
But then there's the fact that you were used. He used you to stroke his ego. In all likelihood, the moment his girlfriend stops treating him like he's her everything, he's going to cheat on her. Or maybe he won't. Maybe this was his last fling before popping her the big question. Of course, if she accepts now I'd think she was crazy. But that's just me.
A
female
reader, trueheartconfused  +, writes (4 May 2007):
He is seeing two women (or more ) at the same time. No men would drive to see you and send you flowers without asking something in return, this something is usually sex.
He did not want to sleep with you yet because he wants you to fall in love with him , he will sleep with you after you are hooked.
Be careful and protect yourself , young girls your age is easy pery for these kind of guys.
I maybe wrong about this guy , and I hope I am wrong, just be careful, don't share a guy with other women , if he really loves you , he will leave his girl friend for you .
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