A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This married man I work with is RIDICULOUS! Im young and single. At first it was flattering, but now it just makes me feel dirty. I just started working there a month ago and he stares at me ALL the time. I wont go into too much detail but its totally obvious that he's attracted and he's a professional - so I definitely don't think it would ever cross the line. He's much older, in a higher position and his wife is absolutely beautiful. He doesn't wear a ring so the signals were confusing at first. Why do guys do this? I know it's just looking, but I feel like there's a mutual attraction there. I'm human and he's good looking and successful, but that's where it should stop. I'm friendly and want to be cautious not to send mixed signals. I'm here to do a job and need to shut this down ASAP without any confrontation (not even remotely an option here). Any ideas?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (30 March 2013):
 Its creepy I know. Use body language to tell him you're not interested.Like when he looks at you turn your cheek away from him. Avoid eye contact. Give him the 'dont undress me with your eyes' look.
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (29 March 2013):
If saying something to him (it doesn't have to be a "confrontation") is absolutely not going to happen than you have two options: accept it or de-beautify yourself.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 March 2013):
 His not wearing a ring is not a signal... some people do not wear wedding bands and that's ok. it's their choice.
how do you know he's staring at you all the time aren't you engrossed in your work?
why do guys do this? seriously? he's married not dead and you are probably very young and very pretty and that's nice to look at. He may not be staring but looking a lot and the fact that you find him attractive is the problem
If he was a gnome of a guy you'd just laugh it off.
Here's the thing, until he approaches you there is nothing to shut down.
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