A
male
age
41-50,
*ostguy27
writes:Well were to start. I was married for three years.. some of it was a happy time. We seemed to have our problems like every couple. Sometimes when it got to a point where it was a bad fight. She would say somthing about just leaving... and of course like a moron I would tell her to leave. So this first time this happened she left for a few days then came back to me. The second time it was actually a month she left me.. and even ended up moving in with a friend.. we of course got back together.. Though she was the one who would tell me she wanted to be with me and misses me. I too missed her and we would get back together. Now this time.. she had been gone for 8 months. Though during that time she would come and visit me.. we have talked about getting back together.. I even spent a fortune on our anniversary. But a little bit after the anniversary she ended up getting a job near the area she was staying at. Since she has gotten this job.. she no longer calls me. She only texts me maybe..... twice a month if that... im a wits end.. I miss her horribly.. I have tried to tell her I know I was dumb... but she does not reply... She mentioned once she went out with a guy friend.. because she thought it was time to move on..But she tells me she love me.. then doesnt contact me at all.. I dont know what to do.. and would like a Female perspective on this to let me know what she might be thinking or doing.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): she left for 8 months and nothing - i think it is time FOR YOU TO MOVE ON. she clearly has and she does not respect you as her husband. you deserve happiness and love. so yes, the hurt will continue for a while but in the end you will find yourself again. good luck and remember this- you will find love again. just a matter of time.
A
male
reader, Lostguy27 +, writes (26 July 2009):
Lostguy27 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe didn't communicate very well. We tried working on it though. The main thing was she would sleep all day and not do anything... and I would let it go for a while then when I would say somthing she got mad.. She would have a job for a little bit then leave it.. so money was tight, But everytime we did split up we always stayed in contact and still saw each other. It went from seeing each other to phone calls, to texting then to a few texts now nothing..
Like LonleyTwo said maybe it is time to move on... I just never thought I would be so lost without her.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (26 July 2009):
 Sorry to hear you're in limbo here. So since you got married, your relationship was deteriorating to the point that she would leave you? What was going on that was so upsetting she would actually move out?It sounds as though you two would then get back together without ever having done any work, had any counseling or otherwise dealt with the issues that split you up in the first place. Is it possible you both put your heads in the sand and hoped things would magically improve?I have no idea what's going on in her head because I don't know the details of what drove her out of the house. Tell us about the communication styles you two have, tell us what her complaints were, tell us what your complaints were. Then perhaps we can help you get a handle on why you are where you are.Thanks.
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