A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im a 25 year old married women with 3 kids all from my husband. I have been with him for nearly 9 years now and been married for just over a year. A few months ago i got back in contact with my first proper love. We have been talkin ever since. An all my feelings have come flooding back. I have met him twice since being back in contact but nothing has happened. We have shared a kiss but thats about it. I really feel as though i love him, but i dont want to hurt or upset my husband or kids. But i cant seem to get this other bloke out of my mind. What should i do as my marriage is as good as it can get. Im a bit confused and need some advice on what to do. Am i just being selfish?
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your replies. I know im being selfish. I need to cut all ties and be happy with what i have got. Thanks for your support and Honesty. x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2011): Yes you are very very selfish. You are destroying your marriage and you are going to put 3 innocent lives in a mess.You have been married for only a year yet you have started cheating so soon. Not good at all!Hey if you want this so called first love, then yes leave your husband. What you are doing is not fair to him also
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A
male
reader, eddie85  +, writes (20 May 2011):
 First loves are extremely powerful. I know I still think of mine from time to time. For whatever reason, it is like a drug that beckons you to rekindle those glory days and ask yourself "what if".
Like any drug, though, it comes with a price. Too often we forget the bad times. There was a reason why you and your first love broke up, and more than likely it is still there.
If you are serious about being faithful and maintaining your family, you need to cut this guy lose. Seriously, be honest and upfront with this other guy or simply cut him lose, but to protect yourself, you need to let him go and the sooner the better. Please no games either (secret emails, friends on facebook, etc)
Yes, it will be extremely difficult and painful. You'll always wonder if you are / were making the right decision, but I hope when doubt crosses your mind, you take a good hard look at your kids and ask yourself how they would feel living in a home where there father wasn't present or they could only visit their father every other weekend because you had a fling with a former boyfriend. When you play the story out to its probable conclusion the result isn't so rosy, is it? Also, imagine how you would feel if your husband did this to you.
Again, I sympathize and empathize with your plight. Your task isn't easy, but I hope you are strong and make the right move.
If you need help, you might want to enlist a trusted girlfriend for support.
Cheers
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A
male
reader, ojii onaze  +, writes (20 May 2011):
 that can harm your home, you are a new person now, please keep off him and be matured!!!
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A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb +, writes (20 May 2011):
 You never get over your first true love. I often think about mine, but would never dream of being with him and not be with the man I truly love. Not to mention my first love is married, ha ha! Seriously, I wouldn't make contact with him, if it leads you to kissing him. You know as well as I do that one time, kissing will lead to something you're going to regret. Do you really want to jeopardize your marriage?
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