A
female
age
36-40,
*uriosity1103
writes: Okay, so I'm 23 and me and my man have not been together long- but we but be became serious pretty quickly... I never like texting much... Well we don't get to see eachother as much as we'd like bc I'm a mother and can't always get a sitter... When it comes to texting I usually wait for him to text me because I don't want him to think that I'm to obsesive or something... I think I'm nervous being a mom and all and have been trying to let hime control the speed of the relationship without telling him that he has control of the relationship... and let him still have time with his frineds even when he says he would rather see me so he doesn't think I'm trying to tie him down... My question is what do guys like when it comes to texting?? Someone who texts them whenever they are thinking about them, somone who the guy always has to text first... or what???Thanks
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male
reader, Odds +, writes (20 May 2011):
It's a little different for every guy, but it's never all one way or the other. A good rule of thumb is to respond promptly whenever he texts you, and to send a random "thinking of you" or other thoughtful message if you haven't heard from him in three days.
Just be ready to adjust that based on his reaction and on how long you've been going out - so, after you've been dating a while, you might text more or less often, or say something sexual. Or if he seems to really like the texts, maybe send him a random greeting every three days, whether you've heard from him or not.
A
male
reader, Universe Man +, writes (20 May 2011):
I think you've got the right idea in general. It's best to be careful not to come across as needy, obsessive, etc. But it is okay to take a little initiative and be the first to text him, now and then.
What is his behavior like? Do you think he's shy and wants to contact you more than he does? If so, you have some room for error and can be a little more forward. On the other hand, if he's a little more aloof and hard to get, you don't want to give him reason to think he has to keep his distance so you don't get clingy on him.
Generally speaking, it's nice when a girl shows some interest independent of being contacted first. But not too much.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2011):
One man's opinion:
I hate texting. Pick up the phone and call him or - if you wish - write a letter/e-mail.
Texting is good for some things, but it is intrusive. If you want to, you can text him to ask him if he has time to talk or once in a while text something sweet or dirty (by which I mean once a week max). Overall, I think texting offers the worst aspects of both phone calls and e-mail.
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