A
female
age
30-35,
*shley.love
writes:My boyfriend says that he wants to marry before I go into the NAVY and that this is our engagement stage.... oh yeah we have been dating for 7 months... but any how when I tell our mutural friends he comes back and asks me why did I tell them that we are getting married and a couple of days ago he told me that he doesn't want to get married any more until later on cause at the moment he's not ready. I leave in April 12, 2009, I want to be with him and only but I don't know what else to do or say so that we can stay together. Someone please help me!!!!!!!!!!
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female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (18 February 2009):
 first off...nowadays marraige is not even a guarantee you will be together forever.
You've only dated him 7 months and this is the guy for you FOREVER? You are so young. concetrate on yourself and your life. not him. whatever happens ...happens.
A
male
reader, Tomas +, writes (18 February 2009):
yikes, 7 months? wow, i'd also think that was very fast.I'd be cool with it, not come across desperate. Be understanding, yes it's fast, let's see how it goes ... now he knows that he doesn't necessarily have you. Confidence is attractive, especially if you can stand tall in a sort of gray situation and keep your poise.The main thing I'd say is, if you are going to be in a long distance relationship (LDR), you need to have some clear plans, otherwise it can feel like time stops. Knowing when you see each other next, talking about the future (not so much marriage, which is just a ceremony, but rather what you want to do, where you want to live, how you feel about kids ... visions of the future), these things keep you together as a team.I'd focus on those. Weddings are best when you are already in reality married when you get to them. If you can do an LDR and build a common vision of a future together, the wedding will be icing on the cake. (Focus on the cake.)
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