A
female
age
30-35,
*oloved89
writes: Why is it that every single time that me and my fiance have a falling out we always end up having make-up sex? I've told him before that I think he chooses to bring up an argument a lot of times is just so we can have sex. And sometimes this makes me think that sex is all he wants, but he says he really really loves me. Any advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): Make up sex can be great. Although not so great that its all you want from your partner, so I dont think you should be concerned. I also believe that with some time, you learn how to put the energy you put into makeup sex, into "normal" sex.
I will admit though that at times with my ex, I would pick a fight with him over silly small stuff, just so we could make up and have sex. Make-up sex with my ex was amazing.
PS. this was not the reason we broke up!
A
female
reader, BlueBag +, writes (18 November 2009):
I don't agree that make-up sex is a "manipulative" act. In my opinion its is the best thing about fighting! :)
Aslong as the argument is resolved before you have sex then I don't see any harm in it.
However, if you are ONLY having sex after a fight then that isn't healthy. I don't think that he would want to initiate sex by starting a fight, that's a bit strange. Does he initiate sex in other ways?
If your boyfriend is starting arguments a lot then before you rise to the bait, take a few calming breaths and think before you react. If an argument can be avoided then it should be.
Hope this helps :)
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (18 November 2009):
Well, I've heard about this kind of thing since forever. In my opinion, it is kind of a makeup resolution that never really gets at the root issues that are causing ongoing conflict. But since I have never applied such a strategy, I don't really know. With a lifelong amateur interest in psychology and male/female relationships, however, I would consider "make up sex" to be manipulative and little more than a superficial band-aid to coverup deepening wounds in a possibly ill-fated relationship. You be the judge.
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A
male
reader, eddy_nicolas +, writes (18 November 2009):
well,
next time when he wants to seduce you,make him wait.leave that desire to burn inside him.and try to have a nice conversation.
if you will see that he will get mad about it and if he wouldnt be able to hold himself.that means that all what he wants is sex.
hope that this helped/^^
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