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anonymous
writes: I am in a relationship of 20 months. He helped me through my tough divorce. I now live on my own and we see each other a lot at weekends and make contact in the week. I like living alone and would not want us to live together. Where i work a client has come in over the last 4 years, I have always been attracted to him. Out of the blue he asked me out for lunch a month ago, I went without a thought. The attraction was amazing between us.I told him of my relationship, he was fine about it and said we were just having lunch and no one would get hurt. Guess what I was seen with him by my boyfriend so you can immagine what happened when we next met.The other guy is on my mind a lot, works away a lot, but has asked to meet me for lunch again. I so want to go, know that something could come out of this meeting, yet feel pulled because of my relationship.I am in my 50's now divorced twice and cant understand why I am doing this, is it my age, am I flattered by the attention,. why cant I just settle for what I have. Should I let the opportunity go of seeing someone I have always been attracted to.......should I stay with my guy and accept life as it is.Thank you
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A reader, Travis Isbell, writes (1 March 2005): The question lies not with us but with you. In economics we were tought about oppurtunity cost which is basically your talking the next best alternative then the one that you already. You have to ask yourself this. Am i attrated to my boyfriend? Do I want to spend the rest of my life with him? Love only him? See only him? Marry only him? Live with only him? Raise kids with only him? Have him influence my life of is the other the better choice. The option is up to you. You are at the fork and not us. But I can say one thing whoever you choose will be permanent so make sure you make your choice wisely because the choice will not only affect you but also those around you. And if this lunch wander is still in your mind answer me this don't most men lose interest or stop being romantic when they have you in their grasp so tell me is he that tempting to rune what you have. And my best advice to you watch your man for a year. Meaning watch how he treats others including his parents especailly his mother because that's how he will treat you.
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