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anonymous
writes: I MET MY BOYFRIEND 3 YEARS AGO. HE HAS A DAUGHTER OF 12 AND HIS EX WIFE LIVES IN THE SAME TOWN AS US. MY PROBLEM IS HE DOES EVERYTHING FOR HIS DAUGHTER. HIS DAUGHTER IS IN OUR HOUSE TILL 10.00 EVERY NITE WHEN MY PARTNER IS NOT WORKING, AND STAYS ON FRIDAY NIGHTS. SHE HAS TO RING HER MOTHER EVERY NITE BEFORE SHE IS DROPPED IN AT 10.00 AND STAYS EVERY WEEKEND WITH MY PARTNER'S PARENTS OR US. I SAID TO MY PARTNER THAT I WASN'T HAPPY WITH THIS HAPPENING EVERY EVENING AND WE GET NO TIME TO OURSELVES BECAUSE HIS EX WIFE NEVER PICKS HER DAUGHTER UP, AND HE SAID I WAS JEALOUS OF THEM. HE GOES TO THE PUB IN THE EVENING NOW AND COMES IN ABOUT 9.00 AND IF I SAY ANYTHING HE SAYS I'M TRYING TO CONTROL HIM. A WEEK AGO WE GOT INTO A TAXI AND THE TAXI DRIVER ASKED HIM IF HE WAS GOING TO A STREET IN OUR TOWN WHICH IS THE SAME ROAD HIS EX-WIFE LIVES ON, BUT WE HAVE LIVED TOGETHER THE LAST 3 YEARS AND USE THESE TAXIS EVERY WEEK.PLEASE HELP ME AS I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK ANYMORE. ALL I GET NOW IS INSULTS AND THE COLD SHOULDER AND TOLD THAT I NEED TO SEE A DOCTOR, THAT I'M MAD.I KNOW THAT HIS DAUGHTER IS PART OF HIM BUT SHE GETS TO DECIDE EVERYTHING WE DO, ALL OUR HOLIDAYS ARE DOING WHAT SHE WANTS ALL WEEKENDS.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2005): I've been told that when two people have children together there is always a bond there and the tie between your bf and his ex is one you will have to live with. It sounds like his ex has cleverly manipulated the situation so that his daughter will come between you and your bf. If you can't stand the heat I'd get out of the kitchen!
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