A
female
age
36-40,
*hinjes
writes:I have been married for 3yrs now and with 2 children, but right from time I have been that kind of girl who doesn't usually get moved by sex. Right from my university days I have been so protective of myself and the fact of not getting used made me to avoid being with men although I later lost my virginity when I was around 19 years old. My boyfriend took my virginity then; I really don't have this passion or drive for him. Though I accepted to date him because I was so eager to know what sex was all about. I didn't have any passion or love for him but I dated him out of sympathy for him having so much love for me. Though my relationship with him went well until I broke up with him. My husband and I have sex but he has always been the one to initiate it and we have been doing like that for four years. Before I met my husband and started dating him, my sex drive increased a little because I love him, but after having two kids, I have found out that my sex drive is decreasing to the point it seems I'm no longer attracted to my husband sexually. But I love my husband , recently he started complaining about sex that I'm not usually feeling like sex from him which makes him wonder why I won't demand sex from him. He says that I have never demanded sex from him since we met. I really don't know why I'm like this. Is something wrong with me? Sometimes I wonder whether it’s because I do masturbate when I'm alone. I started masturbating even before I had the real sex. But I have stopped masturbating since 1 year now yet no improvement in my sex life. I don't enjoy sex, it seems like stress to me but I want any advice on how to improve on my sex life at least towards my husband to save my marriage. Although I lack in some experience sexually because was so uptight when I was with that my boyfriend and I never allowed him to teach me well. Now everything is turning against me now (1) I lacked the experience (2) I'm not always ready for sex towards my husband (3) although I love my husband but I don't feel like having sex with him all the time, even when I have the sex with him, I do it basically because I feel it’s my obligation towards him as a wife. Please, I need a solution, how do I be a normal woman towards my husband and want sex like other women do.? Is it because I like that masturbation then, because I feel so good then or what? Please, help me. I LOVE MY HUSBAND.
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broke up, lost my virginity, no longer attracted, ready for sex, sex drive, sex life, university Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Glacier  +, writes (12 April 2013):
I would go to a doctor and have a general checkup and your hormones checked out.
A
female
reader, chinjes +, writes (12 April 2013):
chinjes is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks glacier, well I haven't xperienced orgasm from sex before and we do some styles too. I really don't knw, even when he comes back from a trip like say 3 or 4mths that drive won't be in me still. I don't knw why!! I prefer just to stay and play with him and my kids. I really need help!!
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A
male
reader, Glacier +, writes (12 April 2013):
Have you guys tried experimenting in new sex positions? If not, then that might help.Do you have orgasms from sex?
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