A
female
age
30-35,
Nemo45
writes:"What infuriates me the most is how two people are supposed to be best friends go through so much crap within such a small space of time. Petty, pathetic, childish crap."Love-stricken crap. The worst thing about this is how, in theory, its nobodys fault. You can't blame the whole of society, or the feelings of a human being. Ultimately, being gay or bisexual isn't wrong. Its not a disease, its unlikely to even be chemicals in the brain - as other theorists would argue. Its just who we are. Its like being a boy or a girl, black or white, English or Chinese - its just what makes us who we are.Loving someone isn't wrong. Showing some affection, feeling something positive towards someone, isn't wrong. Its meant to be a good thing. Its not a crime, its just the emotions we feel. We can't change that, however hard we try we can't stop loving someone. And when someone else loves you back, you're one of the luckiest person in the world. Because even with all the money in the world, or even friends, you need some love. It's a lonely life without some.Trust me. Loving your best friend isn't wrong either. It may be inappropriate, particularly with differences in sexuality, but its not wrong as such. So how do you prevent yourself from feeling something 'inappropriate'? Creating an uncomfortable atmosphere to say the least, and making life incredibly difficult. Do you just learn to get over it? Use time as your healer? (Afterall, time is known to be the best). Or do you try and hate them? Completely flip your perspective of someone to try and change how you feel about someone so at least you're not loving them. I've done the latter several times, and it takes a little bit more out of me everytime. Or do you do something more drastic? Like die?Thousands of people kill themselves because they can't deal with their sexuality or emotions. You think they're crazy, emotionally unstable people yet people are rarely out there to support them - its difficult. Thats what makes this site so special; people volunteer to advise people in their day to day, relationship lives out of sheer good nature. But ultimately, people still struggle to tell people how they feel about someone; confess to their sexuality because to the other person its wrong. Going back to the quote at the beginning of this 'article/story'; I'm losing my best friend because I love her and of course, she doesn't love me. I'm struggling to deal with the fact she'll never love me like I love her. I'll get over that, but there are others that will struggle for the rest of their lives over the same thing. There needs to be a change in how people percieve others' situations in the world.Its not wrong for someone to feel something; its wrong to hate someone for feeling something.
View related questions:
best friend, money Reply to this Article
Share |
You can add your comments or thoughts to this article A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2010): I agree. Love is love is love.It's wrong, I feel, to try and reverse your feelings, to try to Hate the one you loved. To rephrase you in a cheesy way, it does chip away at your soul. Don't hate, don't Hate! I don't even think it is the opposite. There's Love and painful yearning and then there is Hate, a completely separate thing.I'm not sure where sexuality comes into play, as you did not connecg that to your particular situation, but if it is a case of loving someone who is bisexual, do so completely regardless of your own swaying, and if it is a case of loving someone who is not attracted to you sexually, do so in the only way you can- as a friend/family/soulmate/whathaveyou. I suppose you could still end up in a nonsexual relationship, but that isn't what was intended for human-folk, I can't believe... the greatest love must include plenty of passion, in my truest opinion. It may fade with age and intimacy, but for many, it burns forever! And why not aim firstandlastofall for that elysial Ideal!- Tante VICTOIRE!
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (22 November 2010):
 Love comes in many forms and should be welcomed however it decides to show up in your life. People know this in theory but in actuality the people who struggle with this need someone there for them in the flesh. If I ever have that opertunity to be there for someone like that I will be.
There are no inapropiate feelings there are only feelings.
...............................
|
