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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I don't have any friends, and I tend to get quite lonely. However, I find it really difficult to meet people, and nobody seems to want to get to know me, even when I try to be friendly to them.I find it easier to connect with people on the internet. The problem is, everything is fine until they start to ask for my e-mail address, or phone number, or give me theirs. Or if they suggest meeting up. Then, I get kind of scared and pull away.I feel really bad about this, because I don't want to mess people around and hurt them. Sometimes I think I am obviously not ready for friendships yet, and that I should stop trying. But then the loneliness gets too much, and I start looking for someone again.I only ever get to know guys on the internet, and I wonder if that could be a factor. I think that if I was talking to another girl, I would be okay, and it wouldn't be as scary. But girls don't seem to want to know me, only guys.I'm in a situation like this now. I have got to know a guy on a social networking site, we have sent each other several messages and get along well. But now, he has given me his number, and I feel scared and like I suddenly want him to leave me alone. I don't know how I can tell him how I feel, I don't want to confuse him, or for him to be angry. And I don't understand it myself. I am lonely, yet when someone tries to get closer to me I feel an urgent need to run away.Can anyone help me understand this, and does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle the situation with this guy? Thankyou.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou for your answers. L*, that is exactly how I feel. Thankyou.
A
female
reader, L*  +, writes (29 August 2009):
i go through phases like that sometimes. I used to long for some close real friendships or dating a particular guy and when it became a reality I backed off. I just felt I didn't want to change my life ... something didn't feel just right. until I met some people whom I felt were more my 'kind' of people. So, you'll get over this by trying to mix with different kinds of people until you find some people who are trustworthy.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2009): you have some severe trust issues! how is anybody gonna like you if you dont like yourself?? fix yourself get out meet people!! not online in person.
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A
female
reader, night gurl  +, writes (31 July 2009):
 you can go up to someone that has the same shoes or pants or something you have then say something like i have that same pair of_________ , and that will start a conversation
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