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Leaving for a month, what should my boyfriend and I do?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Long distance, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 May 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 5 June 2010)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Hi, I really need some advice. Im 15 and a freshman and I met this great guy this year. We go to the same school but we never really talked much but a while ago we started talking and now we are boyfriend and girlfriend. We been toghter for 2 months but we broke up 2 times during the first month. But now the past month we been reallly good and i dont know what i would do without him. But when school ends im leaving the country for a month, and we are both really unsure of what we should do with our relationship. We are worried that we might lose feeling for each other during the month im gone, since we wont be able to contact each other at all. What should we do: break up or just stay toghter? Also im worried because my parents dont know i have a boyfriend because they dont let me date yet, they're really strict on me, so when Summer comes i wont be able to see him much, because of my parents. Should we just break up? I dont know hw to make this all work, but I really like him and he really likes me and we wanna stay toghter. Please give me any adivce possible. Thanks.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2010):

im in the same situation! im 15 years old (almost 16) and hes 17. im going to sleep away camp for about 6 weeks and i havent even told him yet! weve been dating for about 2 months now as well but weve never broken up. im going to his prom with him on june 19th so im scared if i ask him about the summer before, hell just want to stay with me because of prom but if i ask him after, it will be too close to the day i leave to camp and hell be upset i didnt speak to him about it.

as goes for you, i think you can try to make it work. i dont suggest "taking a break" and getting back together when you get back because that never works out well, one of you will end up getting hurt by the other person. if you dont think that you can manage to stay faithful for that month (or he cant) then i suggest breaking it off but ending it on a good note, meaning that you guys are happy now and thats the was you want your relationship to end (not in a fight or anything) i hope this was helpful!

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States +, writes (18 May 2010):

Fatherly Advice agony auntAt 15 I wouldn't give up the summer of love for a boy who may or may not be there when you get back. Just have a friendly parting. You need to meet more guys. That is why your parents restrict your dating. There is no need to be exclusive when you have no ability to make a long term commitment.

I see from your letter that you do see that you yourself are unsure about holding it together over the summer. The best thing would be if you both agreed that you could meet and do things with others over the summer, but promise not to make any commitment to any one else.

Also stop being so afraid of your parents. They love you more than anyone does. They only want the best for you. When you hide things and deceive them it hurts them. You are going to want the around for a long time so, take care of that relationship too.

FA

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