A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i've been going out with my boyfriend for a year and 3 months now...n the begining we had a long distance relationship...i wud do my best to go out to new york nd see him when ever he asked. he never came to pennsylvania to spin time with me tho...and wen i moved out to newyork i saw less of him...i mean he calls me everyday but thats about it..he wanted to be celebite so now im sexually fustrated..dont get me wrong he's a sweet heart...and dispite those things he's the only person i'm open with..but it don't even feel like he's my boyfriend anymore...it feels more like we're buddies....am i wrong for feeling that way?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2010): -well the sex thing i can get over, i mean it is for a good reason but with everything else like me hardly seeing him, he still haven't introduced me to his family, and he don't really take me out. it gets frustrating.. and wen i ask "y dont we do this or when can i meet your fam etc... his answer is always either "soon" "eventually" or "one day"
A
male
reader, savron  +, writes (25 November 2010):
 Well it is not clear why your boyfriend would rather be celibate. If it is due to traditional ideas where couples would develop their friendship and commitment to each other intellectually, spiritually and emotionally before developing sexual bonding that seems admirable. If he views you in a longtime 'marriage' type relationship then that should be exciting to you in a different kind of way.
Any other reason for celibacy would certainly suggest he views you more as a friend, pal or 'buddy'. Really you have to analise your own feelings for your boyfriend a little more clearly. i.e. Would you be considering staying with him for a long long time or would you rather just have some fun together as friends and sexually and see how things go.
Whichever way you feel about your boyfriend it seems you have truly found a good friend or 'buddy' as you put it and someone you would not want to hurt. If this is all your boyfriend is looking for from your friendship then there is no reason why this should not continue.
If however that were his only feelings for you then you would have to discover, very sensitively, how jealous he would be if you were to see someone else. A 'buddy' would not mind and then you would be free to enjoy other boyfriends, friendships and sexuality if that is what you would like.
Chiefly the matter comes down to you and what you are looking from this relationship and by the way you can be 'open' with him you say, so go ahead be bold, try and find out how he feels, why he wants to be celibate and also to tell him what you like and what you are looking for.
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