A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I just got off the phone with my LD boyfriend and I'm a little hurt or annoyed, I'm not sure. He says that I'm too depressing, and that I depress myself for no reason. He brought up the way I get every time we say goodbye when visiting. We only get to see each other once every month or month and a half, and leaving him is the absolute worst, I hate it! I don't cry or anything, but I am obviously a little upset and I always thought that was understandable??Well, according to him, I totally "space out and end in a different world" and that I make him want to "kill himself." I sarcastically told him I was sorry for getting upset about leaving him and he said that he gets upset too but I take it to a completely diffent level. Now, I don't really get upset until 5 minutes or so before we're about to separate and to me, it seems like he can't wait to just go, so for him to say that he does get upset seems like bs to me but I'm sure I'm wrong..at least I hope that I am. Anyway, I'm not really sure how I should react. It stung a bit when he said it. I probably sound like a huge idiot right now, huh? I guess I really shouldn't leave our last moment together for while on a sad note but what am I supposed to do, be super happy that we're saying goodbye or something? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (19 October 2011):
 BTDT! When we started our LDR at first it was short visits and it was easy to leave... as our feelings deepened our leavings got harder and harder for me. AND we had daily email contact and were a mere 2 hours apart by car so we saw each other frequently. It was still hard to leave.
I thought he didn't care like I did because he never got as upset as I did. Till I started not leaving on Sunday afternoons... instead I started staying till Monday morning and leaving to go right to work from his place... so we could have an extra night together... That's when Sunday nights got interesting and he started showing just how much he really hated our parting. He's pick a fight... or he'd drink more than usual... he did not have the words or emotions to express how sad he was that I was leaving... so we talked about it.... and we had to agree to NOT PICK FIGHTS.... he does this to make his parting from me easier... well he did this. I no longer LET HIM...
sounds to me like you getting upset that you are leaving (perfectly normal btw) pushes his buttons and he wants to "be a man" and not be affected.
|
