A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am in a LDR. We've been together for about 2 years. Recently I found out that about six months into our relationship, my boyfriend had food poisoning and had to go to the ER. He called up his ex girlfriend who lived about an hour away from him to drive him to the hospital. My boyfriend lives with five other family members and three of them can drive. He also has many relatives that live within 5-10mins. I asked him why didn't he ask his family member and his response was oh because his ex was always the one to accompany him to the hospital when they were together and she is listed as his emergency contact. I said yea, she went with you when you were together... but you are no longer together, and she lives so far away.. WHY would you ask her and not another family member who lived nearby. He said he didn't know. I asked him why didn't he tell me about it.. I was under the impression that a friend took him.I often thought it was weird because while he was at the hospital, he only texted short brief texts and no I miss you or I love you, which he always does. I thought it was because he wasn't feeling well. But now, that I know his ex accompanied him, it all makes sense why he was acting so distant.His argument is that it has happened a long time ago and is in the past. Now that we've talked about it, I should let it go. But I'm mad because he never considered my feelings and never told me because he was 'afraid I'd get mad' Then why do it? I know that he's totally over the ex now.. I'm sure of that because I can see it in his actions and the way he is when he talks about her versus how he was when we first started dating. But still, I feel it's not fair to me. Should I just let it go as he suggested? Or what can I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2015): Man, I really hate that. My ex-BF was "friends" with his exes and I felt like it was such bullshit. Seriously, there are 300 million people in this country and you insist on your closest friends being the last three people you slept with?Anyway, don't think that your BF is totally over his ex, because if he was he wouldn't have asked her. I wouldn't be surprised if they re-kindled something, but I hope I'm wrong. Maybe I'm just more insecure than some of the other aunts and uncles on here...Regardless, I agree that it was very disrespectful to you and your relationship. What YOU have to decide is if this is worth breaking up over. You have every right to be angry, but if you choose to stay together then you need to make every effort to get past this in a reasonable amount of time. I think it would help if he gave you a genuine apology, but it doesn't sounds like that will happen. So the best you can do is to ask him not to do it again. If he does, then LEAVE HIM!
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