A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Are some men just lazy communicators (text, phone) rather than 'not interested'? If so, does this make them emotionally unavailable or just lazy? How does a woman bring this up with a man in the early stages of dating without looking like a clinging nag?- thanks! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for the replies. It really helps.
No I wouldn't carry out a courtship via text, I've already experienced the madness of text-bombing with someone else. TBH I'd rather he's like this than bombarding me.
I'm actually quite lazy when it comes to picking up the phone, doesn't mean anything about the other person. I think I'm just used to people using text as the primary means of communication.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (18 March 2015):
 I don't text much at all. It might be a "honey, pick up milk and green peppers on the way home". I don't carry on conversations over text. EVER.
That doesn't make me lazy.
I also DO NOT call my husband while he is a work, unless there is an emergency. We will talk when he gets home. And we BOTH have things to do.
I dated before the cellphones and texting were available, so maybe I do have a more RELAXED relationship with my phone than most younger people do today. I do NOT drag it with me every where - ONLY time I EVER did that was while my husband was deployed, I DID NOT want to miss a call.
I would say in the early stages don't make a big deal out of it. If he asks you out, takes you out, met up for coffee, WANTS to spend time with you THEN he is interested. NOT if he texts you copious amounts of non essential messages.
DO NOT carry on a courtship or a relationship via text.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 March 2015):
 it's not just men some folks do not text. some folks don't like the phone it's not lazy it's just the way they are.
does no mean they are not interested.
my husband does NOT text. he hates the phone.
we communicated (and still do even though we now live together) by email A LOT. I sent him 4 emails yesterday. we use it for important stuff.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (18 March 2015):
 I do not like texting one single bit. He may be more of a man of action who prefers to be WITH you when he communicates. Texting is inefficient, and he may in fact be dyslexic or have an aversion to texting as a rule.
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A
female
reader, MSA +, writes (18 March 2015):
 My take is, if he keeps replying but in short one word texts, he's lazy. If he doesn't bother to reply or send one minimal reply after you've sent a dozen messages, he's not interested.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2015): Yes, men are lazy especially about texts. I am very much emotionally available for my wife but if you are to compare our texts, she writes in paragraphs and I answer in syllables. Why is that? Because those texts contain only one small actionable purpose, and whole lotta description why. Men aim for action and if I'm devoted to you I don't need too much explanation as to why. Of course, women misconstrue this as being rude. Far from it.
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