A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been in a relationship for nearly 6 months now. I love my girlfriend very much, but just recently I've started having dreams about an ex girlfriend. Me and my ex broke up over a year ago and we are very rarely in contact any more. I believe I'm over her, but I also accept that I cared for her more than I have ever cared for any other partner both past and present.I am perfectly happy in the relationship I'm currently in and I see the relationship being a long, healthy and happy one. In fact my current relationship has lasted longer than my relationship with the ex in question. I'm very happy with her. The only thing putting doubts in my head are these bloody dreams! While I may not be dreaming of my ex in a romantic sense, I hate the idea that I'm dreaming about her at all, because I fear that may mean that I feel more for her than I think I do. I have been known to talk in my sleep and I can't imagine how awful it would be if I were to talk to my ex in my sleep and have my current girlfriend hear it! That would hurt her greatly I'm sure and that's the last thing I could want.What do you think this means? Am I overreacting or should I have reason to be concerned?
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female
reader, answerfromtheheart  +, writes (4 April 2012):
 Personal story - right before I got married, I started having dreams of my ex. In my dream it was as if we got back together. It has been 11 yrs since I saw him last in reality and although we both loved each other back then, we broke up ultimately because we knew we would not be happy as a husband and wife.
My interpretation of these dreams is that before you are ready to make the next step in a relationship you are currently in, no matter how right the person is for you, this step is a bit nerve wrecking, only because you are stepping into something unknown. so your dreams are coming out of that inner stress you are experiencing.
I also had dreams that I was smoking a cigarette months after I quit, and I would wake up stressed out that I'll start smoking again.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 April 2012):
 They are just dreams.
So have you had 2 or 22 dreams? Is this a few times that your dreams are uncomfortable or is this some sort of mental vendetta of your subconscious to ruin your current romance?
Now, having said that, maybe you are looking for a reason to get out of your current 'wonderful' relationship but don't have a credible or logical reason other than you don't really want it. Your subconscious is giving you an 'out' if you'll take it but logically, everything is fine on the surface. The relationship is fantastic on paper but your heart isn't in it.
You feel stronger about your ex than you do about your present gf. It's been 6 months.
I know I've dreamed some really weird dreams over the years but their content has not ever made me question a relationship. A dream is really easy to dismiss. So the fact you can't means you have something else going on. Maybe you are looking for an 'out'? That's not a bad thing.
I'd say be honest about the relationship to yourself. Then interpreting dreams won't be so problematic.
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