A
female
age
41-50,
*irenaBlusera
writes:Hola,For those of you that don´t know me, I´m an aunt here on this site. I´m always glad to help, and I try to give very direct and sincere advice without judging people.I´m here because I´m feeling a little sad today and I´m not really sure what to do about this situation.I am from Florida but I´ve been here in Spain for over a month, and I am completely in love with Spain and feel like I belong here. I never felt accepted in USA, because my heart just wasn´t in the culture. Today is my last day here in Spain and I have to return to the USA tomorrow. I want to make the most of my last day here but I can´t help feeling sad because I´ve made friends here and my heart is here. People I´ve met here have said that I´ll return, and I know I want to, but I have no idea when I´ll be able to. There are people I´ve made friends with and it makes me sad that I may never see them again. I learned how to be an English teacher while I was here in Spain. I´m a qualified teacher now and I earned my Tefl certificate, but unfortunately it´s difficult for us US citizens to get working papers here. I´m going to try, but it just sucks that it´s so difficult.I earned the Tefl certificate so that I could teach English abroad. My parents live in the USA and I love them with my whole heart, but the reason I decided to go abroad in the first place was boredom and the desire for an adventure. Now, I just want to stay here.I´m looking forward to seeing my parents again, but I dread going back to USA. I´m not putting USA down. I just don´t identify with US culture and never felt accepted there. I know that this sounds really self-centered but I can´t help how I feel. I never felt a sense of acceptance or belonging in USA, but here I feel just that. Spain has never felt like a foreign country to me for some reason. It always felt... familiar. If I didn´t know better, I´d say I lived here in another life. I don´t believe in past lives and reincarnation, but it would explain some things.I studied abroad in Mexico when I was in college and I had similar feelings about Mexico. I was so thankful because I realize how fortunate I am... most people never get a chance to live in Mexico and I got a whole year down there... but then I had a really rough time readjusting to US culture.Now I dread going through reentry shock (the shock of readjusting to your own culture) all over again. I want to be happy and make the most of my last day here and I´m grateful I came here but my heart is in Spain. I cried this morning because it makes me so sad to leave a place where I belong. I´ve said it before, but it´s so true: My heart is in Spain.
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female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (21 March 2010):
SirenaBlusera is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks Eddie and marriedlady, that was nice
A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (21 March 2010):
SirenaBlusera is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHow do kids manage to study abroad there for a year or semester? I'm sure that takes more than three months.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2010): i'm sorry to inform you, if you are not European and or don't have permission to stay in Europe you will be prosecuted if you stay there more than three months
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2010): well you know that im rooting for you sirenablusera... mal
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (15 January 2010):
SirenaBlusera is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both for saying that I can find a way to go back. .
I still miss Spain so much!!!!
Sometimes I feel sad because I remember how far away it is and it feels really overwhelming... I'm still in love with that place.
I've done some research and there are ways to go back :)
I've decided to apply for CIEE, I've checked this exchange organization out and I think they're legitimate. I'll have to wait until next year because it's necessary to save some $$$ before moving abroad.
It's only a year-long exchange, though.
I'm not putting USA down but I would like to move abroad for good...
Hey Eddie I just wanted to say that I've never been to Puerto Rico but I've always wanted to go there!! I'm not sure what jobs would be easy to find, but I imagine that you wouldn't have to go through all the VISA red tape and crap like in Spain. Mexico, Spain, Puerto Rico... these are the top three places I've always dreamt of visiting or living in and I've been to Mexico and Spain. :) Me falta Puerto Rico.
¡Claro que hablo español!!
Gracias por la buena onda. :)
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (15 January 2010):
SirenaBlusera is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you both for saying that I can find a way to go back. .
I still miss Spain so much!!!!
Sometimes I feel sad because I remember how far away it is and it feels really overwhelming... I'm still in love with that place.
I've done some research and there are ways to go back :)
I've decided to apply for CIEE, I've checked this exchange organization out and I think they're legitimate. I'll have to wait until next year because it's necessary to save some $$$ before moving abroad.
It's only a year-long exchange, though.
I'm not putting USA down but I would like to move abroad for good...
Hey Eddie I just wanted to say that I've never been to Puerto Rico but I've always wanted to go there!! I'm not sure what jobs would be easy to find, but I imagine that you wouldn't have to go through all the VISA red tape and crap like in Spain. Mexico, Spain, Puerto Rico... these are the top three places I've always dreamt of visiting or living in and I've been to Mexico and Spain. :) Me falta Puerto Rico.
¡Claro que hablo español!!
Gracias por la buena onda. :)
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (2 January 2010):
 Yo tambien tengo un corazon y alma latino y soy de canada. I'm assuming you speak spanish. I spent lots of time in Puerto Rico in 1987 after marrying a woman from there. It was the best time of my life, I'm still with her and we go back often. As a US citizen, that is a place where you can go and live without any visa or imagration worries. It's a US territory. Anyway, the latin culture has become a big part of my life. I made a good effort to learn spanish and even though it's not perect, I do very well. Puerto RIco is not really poor so you won't get that helping out feeling but neither is Spain.
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (1 January 2010):
SirenaBlusera is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just wanted to say thanks so much. It really means a lot just to have someone listen.
I really enjoyed my time in Spain, but just wished that there could have been more. There were a lot of things I longed to do but unfortunately didn't have the time to do. I know how blessed I am to have been able to go, but now that I'm back in USA I feel like I've left half my heart behind.
It means so very much to hear from you guys, because I have to keep reminding myself that I can go back. I know my letter sounds self centered but I believe you have to follow your heart.
Sometimes I wish that I could just be in several places at once, or magically teleport myself from one place to the next. I'm one of those people that has a profound desire to have new adventures and loves surprises. Even though I have already been to Mexico and Spain, though, they've grown on me. Having been was something really special and like I said I'm grateful that I went... but I want to be happy... and I just felt a sense of belonging there.
I hope that this doesn't sound imperialistic but I am thinking of returning to Mexico because I feel I could do good things there... teaching students down there would mean giving them more opportunities in life. Mexico is an amazing country but it would be insensitive to pretend that there were no problems (economy, etc). As a teacher I could improve someone's chances in life.
I feel a little sad, still, but reading the messages from you guys helps me see things from a positive vantage point... I'll have to keep looking at it that way. :)
Happy New Year, btw. :)
Sirena
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A
male
reader, eddie +, writes (30 December 2009):
Start planning your next move. Set a goal and figure out how to make it happen
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): all i know to say is to apply for a visa and change your citizenship...or perhaps move closer to the mexico/usa border. You feel what you feel. You are not a flighty teenager, but a mature woman. Dont spend your life regretting what you should have done. Make it happen. You can find a way to go back. Apply for every possible job available. And enjoy this day sweetie...make the most of every moment. Mal,
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