A
female
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*una~
writes: This past weekend, I spend my weekend at my boyfriend's. I had dinner with his family (parents, siblings, cousins). My bf's parents start introducing me to others as my bf's fiance. Me and my boyfriend is really close and we are seriously looking into living together in the next few months. I was shocked and my boyfriend was shocked too. I said to him that it's his mother, and he should look after it. My bf agrees to have a talk with his mom without getting me involve.Just wondering if anyone have a different definition of "fiance" other than those who got engaged.
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (26 February 2007):
Hey sweetness,
I know no other definition. I think CD hit it right on the nose. Did your boyfriend mention that you two were thinking about living with each other to his Mother? I know some people who just are old-fashioned thinkers will jump to the conclusion that you're engaged.
Or maybe like CD said, they're conservative or religious...
But it's great that your boyfriend is going to talk to his Mom without getting you into it. That's so sweet and such a relief for you! I'm sure after their discussion, you'll know why she thought or said you were his "fiancé".
Good luck, sweetness.
xxIndia
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2007): I agree with Cd. It truly does appear perhaps his Mother has strong values about what constitutes a live-in arrangement. She maybe thinks living with someone constitutes marriage. Perhaps in her mind, if she knows you both are going to be living together, she is assuming (and hopeful) that you both are going to tie the knowt, someday. Or if other family members know of your upcoming live-in arrangement, perhaps Mom feels a bit torn about it about it all, (not everyone is agreeable with live in relationships) and prefers to call you 'his fiancee' to appease her her embarrassment and mixed feelings about all this. Let your bf talk to her. But hey, I say what's the big deal? If it makes his Mother feel better to call you his 'fiancee', let it go.
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A
female
reader, Girlie_girl!! +, writes (26 February 2007):
I would just suggest that it was an assumption especially if they're an older generation. I wouldn't worry too much and i wouldn't give ur boyf a hard time about it, or get him to deal with it. i'd pron just leave it, as u may cause offense when id suggest it's not really neccessary. GG x
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (26 February 2007):
There is no different definition. What it sounds like to me is that perhaps your boyfriend comes from quite a conservative or religious family and his mother introduced you like this to show that it was okay for you to be physically affectionate/sleep in the same bed etc. Does that sound possible?
CD
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