A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:hi iam 16yrs old and i have just left my bf after i found out he had another child. the childs mum is my best friend the child is 1year old. me and my ex bf have been together for 9 1/2 months, so he did not cheat on me. he says he loves me but i just don't knwo what to do, my ex bf is due to go on holiday next week with his friends for a month.i found out on monday that i am pregnant. the child is his because i have been faithful to him, i could not believe it so i booked i went to the doctors to double check and i am pregnant. we always used protection and i was on the pill. we were very careful i just don't know what to do. do i tell him, do i not tell him, do i tell him before he goes on hoilday, do i tell him after he comes back off hoilday? i just don't know what to do any more please help me, any advice, please
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best friend, my ex, on holiday, the pill Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi everyone
sorry i left it so long
it's been emotional
well i am keeping the baby
or should i say twins(a boy and girl)
well i am not talking to my ex best friend because my bf did have sex with her(before we were together) but she also had sex with SIX other boys so my bf asked her for a paternity test it turned out that the child wasn't his(me and my bf weren't aware that she sleep with SIX other boys) til the test came back
she then told just she was sorry but she was jealous of our relationship
my bf is at college full time
we have moved into my parents us(well now it's all mine because they had no other children)
so my children her due 17 February 2010
We are getting married in 2010/2011 we are not sure yet once they children are born we will make a choice
thanks to all the advices it helped me so much
thanks again
x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionsome thing i forgot to write
i am nearly 17 and my parents are dead
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questiona answer for A female reader, Klara + ?, writes (17 May 2009):how did you not now about your bestfriend tho , if the kid is one year old?i knew she had a baby i didn't know who the dad was because she didn't tell mewho it was
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2009): You're going to have to tell your ex-boyfriend that he is having another child. It isn't fair not to tell him. Why didnt either of them tell you they had a child together? That's very odd and something you might want to ask your best friend about along with your ex. One thing you need to realize is you do not have to get back together with your ex even if you have his baby. He will be a part of the baby's life but he doesn't have to be dating you. If you decide to give your baby up for adoption there is a law that says you can sign your parental rights away at the hospital with no consequnces. But don't abort the baby. Even if you don't want it there are so many people who will. Talk to your parents and your ex and his parents about all of this. See what you want to do. It's his baby too. Good Luck let us know what happens.
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A
female
reader, arie  +, writes (17 May 2009):
 ok i know this may be hard but you really need to tell him about u being pregnant as sooon as possible sweety. and that is before he goes on his little holiday break. you say that he has been faithful but u have to understand that he will always have to be a part of your bestfriends like because he is the father of her baby too. and that will make you be a part of his and her life. sweety u probley hear this from everyone but if he truely loved you he would have told you the truth about his other child and if he truely loved you he would have waited until yall was older to be having sex. you really need to to careful. i know u used pertection but u know that is is not one hundred percent, so look what happend. i dont want to make you feel uncomfortable and sad about what u did but anything can happen at anytime and this is an unplanned pregnancy and i wish the very best for you. um oh and do not obort your child either if you dont want to keep it the best thing you can do is give it up for adoption because u need to give it a chance to be happy with another family because abortion is the most selfist murder to commit. anywayz u really need to tell this guy and his parents too. and good luck sweety. oh and keep god in your life because he can really help u in a situation better than i can ok. he has all your answers. goodluck and godbless
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2009): Tell him before he goes on holiday, definitely! TThis can't wait, also tell your parents
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2009): It seems strange that your "best friend" would have a child with your current boyfriend and neither of them bothered to tell you...Anyway, I think you should let him go on holiday and take some time to think things through for yourself. You keep calling him your ex, so i assume it's all over with him? So many people on this site are anti choice, but in your case I would suggest that you speak to your doctor about the possibility of having an abortion. Just get the facts, let them talk you through it etc.Being single and 16 and a mum is going to be VERY difficult, and it's a choice you shouldnt take lightly. Tell your mum or an adult close to you and try to work something out. Whatever happens, make sure that you take your birth control pill the same time every day, and that if you skip one, to take extra precautions. If you dont want this to happen again, use two forms of birth control at the same time.Good luck!
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