A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi there I was with this girl for 6 years and just saw her weekends told her it was over cos i said i fell out of love with her really i just found someone new, well my ex is pregnant and its mine but i now want to live with this new girl i met and i don't want anything to do with my ex and the baby. I reckon she only did it to trap me... so anyways when can i move in with my new gf without it looking bad? She met my whole family but they're not really keen on her.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2011): human
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2010): SHE did it to trap you? How? I mean it's the man that ejaculates in the woman, not vice versa. Unless it was a broken condom you have NO excuse, even then you play you pay if you know what I mean, as nothing but abstinence is 100%. Even things are 99.9%, meaning 999 our of 1,000, means that once in every 1,000 attempts it will fail. Doesn't seem all that impossible then.
Anyways, I never get this...."she trapped me..." arguments, they just don't hold water to me. First off, even if she is on birth control, don't ejaculate inside her, still not 100% fool proof, but it adds to your probability of success. Wear a condom, birth control doesn't protect from STDs anyhow, so it's just good practice.
But anyways, she can't trap you, only you can trap yourself. Now it's time to be a man. You are going to be involved in some way shape or form with this woman now, whether you like it or not. Or you could choose to be that douchebag deadbeat dad. If so, then why would any woman want to be with you? You just showed how you will treat a woman when she gets pregnant, is the other girl special, maybe at the moment, but wait until you face adversity. That's when men become men, and the boys run and hide.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2010): update
eh what she told me like 2 weeks after we broke up and i told her have an abortion now she on about adoption cos she doesn't want to do it on her own and it not like shes the innocent one either she text my friends telling them she pregant with my child and she tryed to ruin my new realtionship by telling my new gf who i have to say is really cool about it and just thinks shes a nut job. she would be 6 and half months pregant and she told me if i wanted to save our family i would stop her from going to america i just think she a nut job and all the thongs she done push me furter away from her.
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A
female
reader, maverick494  +, writes (20 December 2010):
Guys like you are what most girls look upon as douchebags.
Sorry to say it, but leaving your ex to deal with the consequences of what you BOTH did is pretty immature.
Sure, life doesn't always work out the way you want it. And this is not what you want. Well, you should have thought of that before before you were careless enough to have sex without protection. Be a man, face the consequences, think of that kid who will ask mommy what he did wrong because daddy doesn't want to get to know him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2010): you were with your ex for 6 years. surely this means something.whether you want to admit responsibility or not your ex has recourse. your ex did not mysteriously get herself pregnant. last time i checked it took 2 to fall pregnant.be a man and own up to your fatherly duties. LoveGirl
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (20 December 2010):
 "When can i move in with my new gf without it looking bad?"
Short answer is never, based on your current plan. You will look bad for abandoning your baby and for leaving your ex in the lurch with no emotional or financial support. You will be judged for your utter lack of responsibility and your callous attitude and your apparent selfishness, as in, you are concerned only with your reputation and your lovelife.
Perhaps if you show some remorse for the way things turned out, step up to your impending parental responsibilities and prepare to be financially responsible for the child you helped create, you might be given some credit. Right now, though, you sound like a deadbeat dad, and a callous cheater as well. Address those two issues with some integrity and honor, you may be able to rehabilitate your reputation.
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A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (20 December 2010):
 You don't want anything to do with her and the baby? Really? Weren't you there too? Last I knew it takes two to make a baby.
You were with her for six years, how long have you known this other girl? And you are going to move in with her? You said your family doesn't like her.
I think you need to step up to the plate and take care of the baby regardless of whether or not you wanted it to begin with. That is your child. Your flesh and blood. Can you just walk away from that after being with her for six years?
How did she trap you? You just broke up with her, did she somehow know that you were going to break up with her and she just so happened to time it exactly right to get pregnant? How far along is she, do you know? Are you sure she is pregnant? I know that is a lot of questions. Sorry.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2010): "I reckon she only did it to trap me" She didn't do shit dude, you're the one who stuck your dick inside of her without protection.
So you're half the reason she is pregnant. And no her saying she was on the pill doesn't get you off the hook if that was indeed the case.
The only way you can move in with your new gf without it looking bad is standing up and taking care of your responsibility as a father to that baby. That's that, you just have to accept that your ex and her child are in your life forever now, you try to stay away from them then you're still going to have to pay maintenance and frankly why would anybody think anything good about a guy who just ditches his own child because he thinks he was "trapped"
If she really did do that to you man, are you seriously telling me you're going to punish your own child for something it had nothing to do with? That you're going to abandon your own child for the sin of its mother?
You have a lot more to consider here than just whether you look bad in the eyes of other people for moving in with a new girl. Frankly you're not going to find many people that view what you're planning to do to your own kid is a good thing.
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