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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: im need ur help plz ppl!!!!went to uni this year, drunk nite out, 1 nite stand. I dont want you to think i have one nite stands all the time, but it felt right, i wanted to and i REALLY fancied the guy, so i did.Anyway, he carried on texting me and came back again a couple of times. Never for a drink or anything, just sex. Then one night he came round, i wanted to have sex with him as usual but he couldnt,...hed had sex with another girl and 'hurt his banjo string'I was a bit gutted that hed had sex with someone else, but so had i. Anyway i asked him why hed come round if he knew he couldnt have sex-he said it was cos he liked meHe always asks me how many people iv slept with since him etc...and he always rings me when hes drunk. Even over the christmas holidays and on new years eve he rang and text me.Hes quite a cocky guy, always jokes around and calls me a loser etc...but every time i get a txt off him my heart jumps.i think I like him a bit too much now.What do u think he feels???I need ur advice ppl!!!!thanku so muchx x x x
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female
reader, vina_101  +, writes (8 January 2007):
 You are not in a very good situation right now. And I am talking from experience because I have been in the same situation as you. I started liking this guy waaayyyyy too much and then I got hurt. I even posted a question on here (my very first question) and I got some good advice. But sadly it turned out I was just good enough to f*ck and nothing else. And he didn't look at me in anyother way, it was just sex and I wanted it to be more. You see the thing with guys is (I learnt this the hard way) sex is just sex and it doesn't involve emotion. This guy you like probably has no respect for you. Why does he call you when he's drunk? What's up with that? And he's having sex with other girls so that means he doesn't feel for you emotionally and it's just sex between you and him. He doesn't consider your feelings when he's gonna have sex with some other girl. I don't think he will want anything more from you than sex. I'm sorry if this is making you feel bad but you have to be realistic here. I think (since you asked) that he sees you as just his sex buddy and nothing else. But if you want it to be more then you should tell him and see what he says because I know I could be wrong about what he wants since I don't know him and I've never met him. It's worth a try, you don't wanna stop seeing him and then wonder 'what if.' He might reject you, he might not. You should take the chance and ask him. Though I think it is more likely that he will not want more than sex.
Again I apologise for being so negative. I hope it all works out though.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2007): Oh my god! you are in the totally same situation as me, and my head in totally confused! I have been friends with a guy for ages, and got on with him really well. I split up with my bf a few months ago, and since then i have slept with this guy lots of times. At first it just kind of happened one night when we were both drunk and it carried on. He now has said he just wants to be friends, but i think i want more and when i told him he said he just doesn't want a relationship. Everyone has told me to stay away from him when hes drunk hes just using me, which sounds the same as you, but then it is so hard, cos like you my heart jumps everytime i get a text. What are we going to do!! I think though that if you do really like him, you need him to really like you too, other wise he is getting what he wants from sex, and you are just getting used and hurt. If you leave him alone and don't have sex with him when he is drunk, if he wants sex still he will have to do it the proper way by asking you out and going out with you and be in a proper relationship. If you keep sleeping with him and you feel you and him are kind of seeing each other, you are going to be devestated if he gets with another girl. Personally i think guys are so low if they just sleep with people they don't actaully like, so if he does really like you and you leave him, he will come back to you, but it has to be a relationship so no one gets hurt. And if he doesn't come back to you, then he was just after one thing....and no matter how much you like him, u don't need that.
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