A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok i have falling 4 my best friend i have known him 6years and we have been though so much and was the only 1 that understoad when my dad died. and now we r getting together. well we were he has told me that he sometimes takes women out and gets paid 4 it.im kinda ok with it as i understand its a job but im not sure.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2008): If you love the guy and are willing to deal with the fact he DOES have sex with other women as part of his job (I personally have no moral issue with prostitution, so long as no one of forced or abused into it) then keeping the relationship will be difficult, but do-able.
Plenty of other people have gone onto have good relationships in-spite of their partner being an escort. There is no reason why you can't.
On the other hand if it really bothers you, you need to tell him this. Tell him that you love him but you can't reconcile the fact that in the usual sense, it IS cheating, even if no emotion is involved.
You could even suggest he become a male stripper, so that he's still basically doing the same thing, but no sex is actually involved at all.
Or you could tell him you just can't be with someone who has sex with other people besides yourself, for any reason... not matter how much money it brings. And that you want him to find another line of work or you can't continue the relationship.
There are a great many thoughts on the subject. But mine is that you cannot be in a relationship with someone if you are sleeping with somone else, no matter if its part of the job or not. If it is actual sleeping together (not the simulated sex actors in films and on stage), then it is cheating no matter how you rationalise it.
Only YOU can know just where in this spectrum you fall.
Flynn 24
A
male
reader, oldfool  +, writes (8 July 2008):
 If you're not sure, don't come on here! This board is not terribly sympathetic to anything but straight marital sex and premarital sex with a steady partner. They will tell you "he's cheating", he's a prostitute, etc.
Don't worry what the people here think of it. You've got to make up your own mind. The human being is a strange animal. It can do all kinds of thing and make all kinds of adjustments. This is something that could never be appreciated by the culture-bound, straightlaced types that dispense advice here.
If you're ok with it, don't worry about it. If you don't like it, then forget the guy. Don't ask the aunts on here; they are terribly narrow-minded.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2008): how can you be ok with your man taking women out for sex and getting paid for it? he is in a sense a male hooker. no way.. get rid of him and find yourself a descent man.
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A
female
reader, Basschick +, writes (8 July 2008):
 You really have to ask yourself if you're also "okay" with him having sex with them for money because I suspect that might be included in the price. If the price is right. If it were me, I'd wish him well and find someone else in a different line of work. Preferrably one that doesn't involve him cheating on me for money.
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