A
female
age
22-25,
*erry-boo
writes: Well I've been speaking to this guy on facebook for around 3 months. Lets say his name is kian He is lovely and calls me every night to speak to me. I've tried meeting him before but he never turned up. He said his phone died and he couldn't contact me so I said okay. He sends me love hearts and we speak everyday. He keeps asking me if I would do stuff with a lad. I say no and he keeps saying he feels left out because all his friends have had sex and he hasn't. I don't want to do anything with a lad because I'm only 14 and he's 15 and I don't feel ready.Yesterday I went out with my friend lets say his name is Liam.Me and Liam are just friends and he has a girlfriend. Everytime I tell Kian I have been out with Liam he always goes quiet and starts blanking me. He goes out with his female friends and I don't have a problem with It. Today I received 2 valentines cards off my neighbours who like to joke about. I told Kian and he said cool then everytime I text him now he is blanking me. Is he jealous? If I go out with him will he use me? Please help me xxx
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (15 February 2016):
Yes I think he will use you sweetie. It is great to see someone your age admitting that you don't want to do anything with a lad. You are so young and not ready yet. He sounds like he is bad news and just wants to meet you to do things sexual. I think you should stop talking to him. If he keeps trying to contact you, tell a trusted adult or block all communication.
A
female
reader, Mrs.S +, writes (14 February 2016):
He is not right for you. Dump him and find a boyfriend who treats you better and who makes you happy. One is just around the corner who may be too shy to ask you out, open your eyes and value proper friendships.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 February 2016):
I think Kian is bad news. He is IMMATURE and trying to control you even IF you two REALLY don't know each other in person. He won't met up because YOU have already said you are not looking to "do things with a lad" - so what's the point? (in his eyes).
He gives you the silent treatment (you call it blanking you) but it's a basic manipulation move to make the other person feel like they DID something wrong and thus MUST make up for it later. You are NOT doing anything wrong in hanging out with your friend Liam. You are NOT dating Kian, so he has no right to tell you whom you can be friends with and whom you can't. (even if he WAS your BF he still can't tell you that)
He sounds like a little insecure and immature dude. I know at 14-15 it's hard to always consider others, but Kian... isn't thinking about YOU - he is thinking about HIMSELF and what HE can get out of being "friends" with you.
Yes, I do think he would try and use you if you went out. Because he is SO desperate to be like his peers who claim to have had sex etc.
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