A
female
age
30-35,
*elples
writes:i came home from college today. i asked my mom to drop me off mu boyfriends house. he was excited to see me as i was to sew him. when we did see each other, we hugged and what not. not soon after, he found my cellphone wallpaper was of zac efron. i guess he got jealous. i kissed him on the cheek hoping he would forgive me but no luck. i could have stayed at his house longer but i asked my mom to pick me up since he kept playing halo. before i left, i said bye. his brother said byeee and he just said peace. howevee, i didnt realize what he said until after i left his house. i would have blown up. what should i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2009): You aren't going to be able to do anything until he gets over this jealously problem of his. It's not like you cheated or have a pic of a former boyfriend on your phone. It is a totally innocent thing to do. Perhaps you are just a fan. Perhaps you fantasize about being with him. So what?
I can never understand this jealously that men and women have about some celebrity wallpaper on their partner's phone or computer or a picture hanging on the wall. What is the big deal? It's not like they are ever going to get the chance to boink them, date or even likely touch them. Then there are the questions about how some man or woman gets upset because their partner likes some series because of a member of the opposite sex movie star in the series. Jeeze, get over it. If my wife and I got upset every time one of us mentioned that we like some actor who we are looking at on TV then we would never be happy. People like to fantasize a bit. Learn to live with it. If you do it at times then what is the problem with your partner doing it at times.
I just love someone who criticizes a guy like your boyfriend for being immature and then says that they would be upset if their partner did the same thing. Is there some hypocrisy in this picture?
A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (1 August 2009):
 Well, if it would make you jealous, just change your paper?
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A
female
reader, Helples +, writes (1 August 2009):
Helples is verified as being by the original poster of the question I know, I never said I wouldn't get mad if I found out he had a picture of some other girl. I just didn't know what to do to resolve the issue.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (1 August 2009):
 So, how would you have felt if HE had a female star as his wallpaper?
For that matter, the eternal classic female complaint, if h watched porn?
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (1 August 2009):
Is he 12? He sounds 12. If you are at college you really should be dating someone your own age.
Having said that I don't think I'd like it if my husband had a picture of someone else on his phone.
Since he is childish enough to just ignore you and play Halo rather than say anything though, I would just leave it.
It's his problem. Do not give in to the silent treatment or let him have you running round in circles trying to figure out what you did wrong.
If he continues to be moody then ask him what's wrong. If he still won't talk to you like a calm adult then do you really want to be with someone like that?
You say you would have "blown up." You really need to work on your communications skills so you can talk through issues you come up against and not just loose your temper.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb +, writes (1 August 2009):
 Your boyfriend in my opinion is being very immature. So what if you have Zac Efron on your cellphone wallpaper or if you have posters of him in your bedroom or something? Everybody - male and female - has at least one celebrity crush...mine has always been Kevin Bacon, lol!Hopefully this is just a temporary thing and your boyfriend can get over it, but to me he needs to grow up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2009): All (or rather most) couples get kinda jealous when they see a sexy or sexual picture on their significant other's laptop/phone/wall. I'm sure he has some sexy lingerie pics lying somewhere. He's a guy!
He maybe also be very insecure about himself. He shouldnt be mad over it though. It's kinda immature.( I mean at least its not another guy friend). I wouldnt take that picture off your phone cause he shouldnt control you. But just dont make it obvious that its on there. Maybe he'd feel better if you had a picture of you && him kissing on there or something.
TL;DR- He feels unsexy. Make him feel sexy by putting his pic up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2009): Let him get over it, or talk with him about it. Your choice. Idk if he ignored you because he was jealous or if he usually does it, but if he usually does it, he needs to start paying more attention to you, and then maybe you would have his pic as your wallpaper. You know I think a similar situation happened to me once. My husband was helping me clean up my room and found a key chain with a mans face on it. He said what the hell is this? and held up the keychain, but didn't mention the pic. I told him that it was a keychain. I never did talk with him about it. I guess it is one of our unresolved issues. I threw the pic away, though. It was a pic of a guy I used to have a crush on? Idk. I should talk with him about it though, because I didn't like the way he worded his question..."what the hell is...blah blah blah etc."
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