A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:A few years ago in high school I met a girl who was wonderful, beautiful, intelligent, etc. We hung with the same crowd so we were friends and spent time together as a group. I guess I developed a crush on her. I always wanted to ask her out or to dance with me at the school dances but I never had a chance because someone else would dance with her first and then, about 5 months after we met, she started dating another guy. Cut to now, they have been together for four years and though I have had several relationships of my own (none very meaningful) I still have a thing for her. I can't help but mention it sometimes very casually, usually after we have been drinking, I say something like "in high school I thought you were the coolest chick" or "I always wanted to slow dance with you..." or whatever. She doesn't really respond. The last time I said something she got nervous looking and walked over to her boyfriend. I am now seeing another girl who is pretty and funny and all that, and things are going really well, we have been together for about 3 months. I am in college and everything, having a good time. I don't see her (the one I like) nearly as often as I used to because we go to different schools but whenever I do see her my heart skips a beat and I feel like I just want to kiss her.Do you think I should tell her how I feel? Or how do I stop feeling this way? It's been about 4.5 years and I just can't help but want her... I just want her... but she is taken... and she seems very happy... I don't know... I feel like I might love her.
View related questions:
crush Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Dr. John  +, writes (31 December 2007):
 This one has gotten away I'm afraid.
This has happened to me a couple of different times in my life.
Trust me, the feelings for them have never ever gone away.
The thing you need to do is come to grips with it.
Make yourself realize you can never have her and learn to deal with it.
She is obviously happy in the relationship she is in and I do think it would be inappropriate to try to call her out.
It sounds like you have a friendly relationship with her still yet so if you like I don't see any problem with what you wish would have happened. I would tell her, though, that you are happy that she is happy with who she found.
You never know, they could have a big blow up next week or next month and she will remember what you say to her.
That could be your ticket in. However, be prepared for the fact that she may never ever leave him. Hope this helps. Doc
|
