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female
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anonymous
writes: I broke up with my boyfriend about a year ago. I moved here with him but when we broke up he moved away. I am hoping to leave here soon. I have dated a bit but there has been no one serious in my life for quite some time. I am working on a committee right now and there is a married man who has been flirting with me....to a point. He has morals and so do I but I keep thinking about him. We will be in another city together for a business meeting and part of me wonders what it would be like if we got together. I have never looked twice at a married man before. What is going on here?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006): I understand looking at a married man. I didn't do it until recently as well. In fact, until now, I was appalled by any married man that would even suggest making a pass at me.
In my situation, I did not know he was married until after the crush was formed. He hasn't made a pass and I suspect he won't, but the crush hasn't died either.
It is very difficult to find kind, genuine people; let alone, dating prospects. In other words, I can see why you might be attracted to a married man. The fact still remains that nothing should happen between the two of you. Chances are that it will not be the fulfilling fantasy (or even close) to what you might be imagining.
What I have taken from my situation is all the things I like about this married man. I have learned that these are things I am seeking in a mate. So, I turn from him with this knowledge and seek an available prospect.
Enjoy the company of this man, but DON'T put yourself in a situation where you are alone with him...just in case temptation runs high. Good luck and remember to honor yourself.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2006): I posted this question and want to thank the two people who answered.
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A
female
reader, Cool Cucumber  +, writes (20 November 2006):
 He is emotionally unavailable. Actually unavailable full stop...unless he wants a bit of no strings sex. But the problem is no strings sex turns into a rather stringy mess if you get what I mean. So don't go down that well travelled road of dissapointment, regret, hurt and pain. Find someone who can love you for you, who can be emotionally available...and not sneeking around lying to get his way. TRUST is a huge part of a relationship...get with a married man..there aint no trust there in the beginning. How can you trust a man who sneaks behind his wife's back and lies?? Mmmm enough said...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2006): What do YOU think is going on here?
You know darn well it is wrong to "get together" with a married man, so stop fantasizing about it!
If you've never looked at a married man before, don't start now!
It doesn't matter one bit how long ago you broke up with your boyfriend or whether there is anyone serious in your life right now (or whether there ever will be).
Concentrate on the committee work, and forget him!
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