A
female
age
30-35,
*dviceneeded123
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 months. He is my first proper relationship and we really havn't done anything sexually.He has fingered me twice, but I want to return the favour and give him a handjob. Problem is I've never done anything with anyone before, so I really don't have a clue what to do. I have looked it up and tbh I still feel nervous.He is coming over tomorrow and we have agreed that if we get really close with making out, then he can ask me to do it.Any advice? I really want to but when I really think about it I go to cry because I feel alot of pressure to do it right, even though I know I want to.I'm so confused, any help and advice on how to give a good first handjob, And would it be weird to ask if he could guide me with his hand at first. Like hold mine below his and then let go and let me finish once I've gotten the hang of it?
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female
reader, lucy1993 +, writes (28 February 2011):
ask him to have a wank and then watch what he does then you will know what he likes in that subject then do as he does?? xxx
A
female
reader, Adviceneeded123 +, writes (27 February 2011):
Adviceneeded123 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou all for the advice.
It happened today, and I was super nervous I didnt know what I was doing at first and had to get into a more cumfy position to do it. But I just went with it from the videos ive watched and the advice given here
and it was funny because after he went 'are you sure youve never done it before?' So I must not of done that bad.
Thankyou everyone!:)
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A
male
reader, ivanichiaynus +, writes (27 February 2011):
 I agree with "YouWish" and others, but would add that as you know how you like to do it to yourself and he knows how he likes it, you could well find it more fun to demonstrate to each other?
Mutual masturbation can follow, once he has recovered!
Ivan.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2011): As a guy replying to this question, all I would say is that it's nearly impossible to get wrong!
All the practical advice has already been given. Just keep in mind that the most sensitive part (by far) of the penis is the 'glans' (or head). So you might want to just grip the shaft to start with. Don't be too rough and talk to him while you're doing it - a little lubrication makes things easier (and nicer for the guy too). There are many lubricants - just search online.
If he's around your age, he'll most probably be masturbating up to 6 times per day and be as horny as hell. Trust me, he'll love it!
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A
female
reader, FluffyPie  +, writes (27 February 2011):
 Tell him to guide you (actually, if you're not doing it right, he'll show you himself). Don't worry, it only takes practice. It's normal to fail the first times, because it's not your body anymore, the motions/speed/pressure are different. Just practice, let him guide you and don't be afraid of a failure.
When I gave my first handjob it was completely spontaneous, I started to rub him out of nowhere, because we started to make out and we were really turned on. It failed, even if he explained me how to do it, he showed me. The next time I was an expert.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2011): Really it's difficult to 'do it wrong'. Oh, I suppose if you have long and particularly sharp fingernails. But really, there's a thrill involved when it's all new and exploring. Just the fact that you're being touched there, by someone new, makes it a wonderful experience. Rather than have him show you what he does, just give it a try and listen to him. He'll let you know by his sounds, and by whether he's making pre-cum, whether or not it's good. Reproducing what he does for himself is no thrill at all -- he doesn't get anything new that way. Giving it a go when you don't have a clue gives him something new and wonderful.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (27 February 2011):
 I have a good idea for you.
Have him give you a demonstration, if you both are openminded. Have him show you how he does it. Different guys have different techniques. Have him show you what he does for a few seconds, and then mirror what he does. Believe me, he'll tell you whether your pressure is right, and you'll tell by his sounds how well you're doing it.
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A
female
reader, Daphne...x +, writes (27 February 2011):
Hiii :)
I know your first time at anythin sexual can be really nervous, but there's no need to get yourself worked up about it honey. Just ask him to guide you, because after all, men are the best at giving handjobs as they do it to themselves and he'll know what he likes.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2011): My advice is to watch porn and learn from the pros.
Asking him for guidance is also a good idea. Please don't cry... he'll probably just be happy that you're touching him.
I do know why you are so stressed out about it though.
Handjobs really wierd me out. They are trickier and require more skill than BJs or sex because it involves a lot of technique. Essentially you're doing the one sexual act he already has been doing solo for most of his life. Sometimes you're never sure your technique is as good as his own. It is kind of intimidating and it can make a woman feel just a little superflous.
I'd watch some porn for pointers and just try to use your imagination to make up the rest.
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A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (27 February 2011):
 "And would it be weird to ask if he could guide me with his hand at first. Like hold mine below his and then let go and let me finish once I've gotten the hang of it?"....
Thats an excellent idea for your first time. Only I'd put my hand right on top of his. That way he not only helps you get started but can also show you the rhythm and how firmly he likes to be stroked.
Please don't worry about this so much, other than being careful not to bend it there is no way to do it wrong. He'll love it no matter what.
A little bottle of fragrance free lotion might be helpfull to you as well as its better when its slippery.
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A
female
reader, Miss.Knowitall  +, writes (27 February 2011):
 Well.... there is nothing to be afriad of.
And really i have no idea how to explain it that would be any help.
Yes asking him to guide you (or say show me what you like)
That may help you feel less nervous.
If your comfortable with it maybe watch some videos?
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