A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I am embarrassed to ask this as I am 62 years old male. 40years ago I fell head over heels in love with a girl. Our mothers worked together and that is how I met her. She was still in High School. This will sound very odd, but we never dated at anytime. I just knew she was very special to me. One night,out of nowhere she came by my apartment and spent a few hours talking and kissed a bit,but that was all. I had the utmost respect for her and did nothing to to betray that respect. I never asked her out because her father was a police officer and would not have approved of her dating me. Here it is 40 years later and I found her on the internet. We spoke on the phone several times and she invited me to meet her at a wedding she was attending. I went and was so caught up in my own emotions I ended up making a total fool of my self. I love this woman as much today as I did forty years ago. My problem is she says she can only be friends that what she felt then was a crush that she outgrew. She has been married and has beautiful grown children. I have also been married and my children are grown. I have made the mistake of pouring my heart out to her, hounded her with emails, songs, poetry to no avail.S he has said she is sorry that she feels nothing for me and in time I will get over her. 40 years past and I never got over her, how can she expect me to now. Is there any advice for me to possibly change my situation. This is silly I guess since I am a grown man,but the very thought of her makes me feel young again.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2009): you should never feel ashamed that you told her about the way you feel. at least now you know where you stand and you are not living in the past. unrequited love is such sorrowful. i hope i am being being insensitive in saying please move on. rather spend yout time investing in someone else. join a social club or something that interests you. please do not think that this woman will change her mind and hope that she comes to her sense. you have wasted so many years , please do not waste any more. you owe it to yourself to move on and find love and companionship.
A
female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (16 October 2009):
 Like the other posters said, I was also really touched by your post. I have unfortunately had to deal with bad men in the past and to read this makes me feels so much better, so thank you for sharing.
I don't think I can add anything useful here as the other users have already said it all. I agree with the first post, 'disappear' for a while but be there for her if she comes to you.
And I don't think you made a mistake in telling her how you feel, I think it was a good thing. And you saying it's silly you feel this way is not true at all.
You may not get what you really want but by posting this on here I think you have given some of us hope that men do have real feelings and that there are good men out there...thank you for that.
I wish you all the best :)
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (15 October 2009):
 I am so touched by this, it brought tears to my eyes. I agree with previous posters that you should probably give her some space and in time perhaps become friends.
Unrequieted love is the worst to live with but at least you have the capacity to love and not be bitter...so many people have forgotton the meaning of true love and in a world of selfish want, to love unconditionally and for so long, is very special.
I hope you find peace
love from Aunty Em xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am not real sharp on these computers .Hope you got my Thanks
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI want to thank the anonymous lady that posted her reply.It is sad that you feel that men lack emotion.Sad that society says big boys don't cry.I would be willing to bet that many of them do at times even if it is in secret.Your words have done more than you think.I find them comforting if even from an internet friend.There is no one for me to turn to since I am alone and have been for many years.My children are by a a marriage that ended many years ago.They were adopted and we have no contact.Since then I have chosen to be alone with my memory of my one true love.Now I have found her and darn it all I am still alone.Thank you again.May God bless you always.
Lost at 62
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): My reply will probably be of no help but thank you for posting. So often I think that men lack emotion and are incapable of true, loyal, lasting love. You have proven me wrong!Someday she is going to feel lonely and wonder why she ever turned you away. Unfortunately all the recent contact has probably left her feeling annoyed. Don't contact her and just let what you've said sit with her and sink in. I'm assuming you're both divorced so let the loneliness and fear of growing old alone sink in to her. You MUST remove yorself and 'disappear' for a while for this to happen. She might have a change of heart once she's realized that her children and grndchildren can't hold all the love she has to give and she does want and need a companion. This may be years down the road and yes, it will hurt.I'm so sorry. There was a movie similar to this - the man fell in love at 17, loved the woman all his life and didn't get her until he was in his 70's or 80's. The waste of time was so sad because she realized she could have had a long and happy life with him all along. Very best of luck and thank you again for posting. It really means something to me!
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