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female
age
51-59,
*elly2007
writes: ive been in a gay relationship 4 16yrs and have fallen in love with my best mates daughter im not happy in my relationship and have not been for a few yrs now but we have 2 children together so its stopping me from leaving her as i dont wanna hurt anyone but im making my life so unhappy cause of this other woman who is 19 and my best friends daughter my best friend know how i feel and dnt have a prob with me n her daughter pls help me its driving me mad :-(
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female
reader, kelly2007 +, writes (14 January 2007):
kelly2007 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx for replying ive done nothing for the past 9mth than think about how i feel and what would happen if we split and my children are always 1st in my life and always will be thats way im still in this relationship for my children.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2007): I agree that you should try to work at your relationship for the sake of your children but not if it is really making you that unhappy.Children pick up on negativity and you also owe it to your partner to be honest.If you can face working it through then you should defintely give it a go but you only live once and if it makes you so unhappy then you should do what makes you happy.But you do need to remember your children are your main concern, people divorce and spilt up and most children manage but it needs to be handled well or else it can ruin their lives.you need to decide if it is worth the hurt you might cause and if it really is love.16 years is a long time you want to be sure before you through it away.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2007): I am not gay, but I think since you have two children in your primary relationship, you owe it to those kids to work very hard at that relationship...until you can earn your way out of it, the 19 year old girl is probably just a distraction from the painful feelings you have over your current living situation and with your partner, especially if you have been fighting a lot.
My suggestion is to get some individual therapy first, because if you can make some changes in yourself, then your partner has to change in order to respond or react to you on your new found level....and if you can get her to go with you when your therapist feels it appropriate, then do so, but don't just turn away from your relationship and problems, you have a long history together and that is a lot to work from and don't make those kids pay for your mistakes, try your best to leave the 19 year old girl alone, she is probably way to immature for you anyway and you are simply infatuated and don't want to face your issues....hang in and take care.
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