A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: i feel so stupid, i need a good kick up the bum! ive fallen hard for someone that doesnt want me. he is 10yrs younger than me and sees me as a mate only. we used to be neighbours and i moved, i thought that would cure the problem. unfortunatly he has had problems with his g/f and i have been there as a support system and a sounding board. he comes round and talks or brings his x box over and we play games or he picks me up and we go shopping. he sees me as a mate only and asks me for advise on where his relationship is going. before you think anything, i always try to encourage him to talk 2 her and work things out, but when he leaves i wish he was with me. i find myself daydreamin about us which i have no hope of and i dont no how to get him out my head and stop thinking these crazy thoughts. im 42 he is 32 soon. i dont want to loose this friendship but i dont want to feel like this all the time. any help plz
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (30 May 2011):
Maybe you're falling for him, because he's just 'there', so to speak. He does seem to be relying on you a lot - where in my opinion he needs to be sorting this out with his girlfriend a bit more. At the same time, you seem to be relying on him heavily for friendship.
I think what needs to happen here, is that you both just pull back slightly on seeing each other, and you especially try to get out more with other friends, that will give you the chance of seeing other men who may well make you happy, and at least not be taken already.
You don't have to lose the friendship, but I think you need to be making an effort with other friends elsewhere so you can meet other men and women.
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