A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ive grown really close to my bestfriend. We started off as friends but over the past year have just become closer and closer. Now we spend practically all our free time together (we are both at uni doing the same course and share a flat together). I definitely feel there is some chemistry between us. I actually think im in love with her. I know this is a big thing to say because i have never been with a girl before or anything like that but i think about her constantly, i want to kiss her all the time, i want to hold her, i hate seeing her sad and i would do anything to make her happy. Im sure its love, I just dont know how she feels about me. There have been things that make me think she feels the same about me.when we go shopping or wherever she holds my hand. I joked and said that people will think we are a lesbian couple. She said that she doesnt mind if people think that.Also when we go out on a night out guys always hit on her because she is so beautiful. I really hate it. But everytime it happens she tells them that im her girlfriend and shes not interested. I asked her why she said it and she said she would much rather be with me than some random guy. i just laughed it off.She also kisses me on the cheek just like some friends do. But she has started doing it more often and has started giving me kisses on the lips. The other day she kissed me on the lips like she normally does except it lasted longer and she like gently held my face in her hands. then she just looked straight into my eyes, smiled and then walked off. i literally could have just died and gone to heaven!! but i dont know whether she is just being really friendly. She has always been a very cuddly and friendly person. I dont know whether im just reading too much into it because i want it to be more!As i said before we live together in a student flat but she always sleeps in my room with me. We watch tv in the evening and stuff and then just lay and chat. Then we just cuddle for a little while and then go to sleep. She always sleeps really cuddled up to me. i dont know if this is because she likes me or just because she doesnt want to be alone. I dont want to say anything due to the risk of ruining our friendship. i know we will always be friends but if she doesnt like me back i dont want anything to change. I know that the cuddles and kisses would have to stop and i dont want that. BUt i also cant go on like this because i want it to be so much more. What do you think i should do? any help would be great thankyou.
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female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo +, writes (18 March 2010):
 Hey well i have to agree with our anonymous friend and say it does sound very much like she has feelings for you and in my opinion she is trying to show you this without being to forward with her actions. Its true you dont have to start off by talking to her about it, kissing her a little longer the next time and seeing where that goes would be a good idea if you feel confident enough to do that, but at some point you will need to talk about your feelings together as you may want differnt thing e.g a relationship or just casual fun, so it is important to establish that. Also you seem like a clever and open person who would not worry about gender in a relationship, so i think this will go well for you, so good luck and please do tell how it goes, or ask anything that hasnt been answered =]
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2010): It sounds like she likes you to be honest. But it might not be the best idea to just jump straight in there and tell her that you love her and everything. Just next time she kisses you try and make it last longer or something, it might just happen if you get me! You don't necessarily have to talk about it for it to develop into a relationship, maybe just let things develop naturally, it sounds like it's only a matter of time! Good luck, let us know how it goes!! :-) xx
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (18 March 2010):
 You are entering into an unknown territory and you will have to explore the limits of your boundaries.
There is no road map to tell you where you should go or to avoid those pitfalls .
What you can do is to continue to love her with all your heart and always be there for her. Whatever happens, just go with the flow.
There are always new things to learn every day . Enjoy life and have fun .
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A
female
reader, gentledevastation  +, writes (18 March 2010):
She may be confused too about what is going on and embarassed to ask just like you are.
Since you are so close you can probably just have a general exploratory talk with her and go from that. Like if she ever thinks about being with a girl, and even go back to the 'people might think we are a couple'.
It seems like there is something there on her side too. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, Moviefan +, writes (18 March 2010):
 Sounds like she clearly likes you, its up to you no one else can make the decision to take things further or not, if you really do love her and she loves you and you never act odds are you could really regret it later. I liked one of my best friends and she started dating another guy and he just had such a head start on me that once i said something it was to late and sorta of expected that and it really hurt because she admitted she liked me then maybe even loved me but she couldn't be with me because i waited and worried about the outcome and didn't act.
All i can say is if your willing to risk changing your relationship with her forever you could try to make it more and become a couple or you could try to be friends with benefits but that usually gets complicated.
Just ask yourself if you don't get in the car will you regret not seeing where it goes?
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