A
female
age
36-40,
*mandalucy
writes:I have been seeing this guy for about 3 months now. He contacts me every day, makes me laugh, is sweet to me and we enjoy out time together. I was really falling for him and felt an amazing connection I usually don't have with anyone. He asked me a few times to open up to him and tell him how I feel, but I've always been bad at letting my guard down and opening my heart. This past weekend was the St. Patrick’s Day parade in our town, where a lot of drinking goes on. I hadn't seen him for a week at that point and was sure he would make an effort to see me...NOTHING! I called him, no answer. The next morning he texts me asking why I had not called him, which was bull**** yet, after him begging me to come over, I did, and we cuddled for 2 days straight. It was such a nice time. When I was getting ready to leave, I found a green hair clip in his bed, which clearly was worn by a girl on St. Patrick’s Day. I was shocked and he finally admitted it belonged to his ex, and that she was at his house after the parade. I'm so incredibly hurt and confused! I really liked this guy and I wad under the assumption he had feelings for me too. I'm ignoring his messages for now, but there is so much I want to know and say. He swears they didn't they sex but I don't know if I'd be naive for believing that. What do I do? He wants to work things out with us. Do I have a right to be upset although we are not exclusive yet? I already miss him but I don't want o set myself up for heartbreak.Please, any advice would help.
View related questions:
his ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Amandalucy +, writes (8 March 2011):
Amandalucy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your helpful answers. They broke up around 2 years ago because they weren't getting along. My knowledge is that she has had a new boyfriend for over a year now. Her and "my guy" are still civil and they talk from time to time because they have a dog together. This never bothered me. I liked the fact that he didn't have bad blood with his ex but it seems to be more than that... I never had a reason not to trust him before this. He makes it a point to be the last person I talk to before I go to bed and the first person I hear from when I wake up. He does bring his ex up sometimes but I figured he did because they were together for such a long time. Why would he want to be with me, when he gets drunk and winds up with his ex? He says it would never work with her and he doesn't want her back but how can I be sure of that? He would commit to me if I would let him and his calling me as I'm writing this but I just don't feel like can't talk to him rationally right now and exactly explain to him how I feel. I'm so hurt and feel vulnerable which I try to protect myself from so much on a daily basis....so sad.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (8 March 2011):
 Ouch. Actually you don't have a right to be mad because you two aren't exclusive. You're in the muddled gray area of "seeing each other". There's no rules or restrictions. So he didn't cheat but it looks like he's keeping his options open. Not to mention if his ex is still in the picture, I'd come to the conclusion he's not over her.
For her barrette to come off, she had to be doing some sort of activity in order for it to slip off.
At least he was kinda honest, only till the evidence was thrusted in his face. The barrette is foreshadowing of more lies and trouble to come if you continue pursuing this guy.
...............................
|
