A
female
age
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*elarose12
writes:I am a widow ,but I date and have friends,so I don't really feel lonely.A yr. ago i met a man online and we began a good friendship.He was still somewhat involved with his high school sweetheart.We talked about the relationship or should i say I did alot of listening,but that was ok,he had a problem with shyness and it was hard for him to open up.They went their seperate ways and still remain friends.We enjoyed each other's company so much.Before i realized it i had feelings for him ,but i kept quiet.Then he told me his age ,well my heart dropped ,all this time I suppose he thought i was alot younger and what did i do? I lied .I have never acted so foolishly.A few month's ago he told me he had feeling's for me .Oh God what was I thinking ...I told him I did as well .We at this point have no interest in meeting ,were happy the way things are ,I know i should tell him the truth ...but it would hurt him terribly ,my betrayal would be unbearable.I love this man and I do not know what to do.Any advice would be appreciated and yes I know I am a fool.
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female
reader, yelarose12 +, writes (8 July 2012):
yelarose12 is verified as being by the original poster of the question I know all of you are right ,but he has made comments about never dateing anyone over 45 ,so i know if i tell him it won't be pretty .He has my address and my phone number because he sends me cards and we talk on the phone as well.But you know he never puts a return address on any of them .I know the area he lives in ,but thats it .He uses a cam ...I dont.And he keeps asking me to get one.All of you that answered me I can't thank you enough.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 May 2012):
 I would just be honest with him. Lies have a way of always coming out.
If the age difference is a turn off/deal breaker for him then he is NOT for you.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (5 May 2012):
 yelarose: Why do you think that age (difference) has to be ANY issue with you and this man???????
STOP subverting yourself, and START having a good time with him... and let life, love, chemistry and whatever else take over.....
Good luck....
P.S. I date a woman who is 11 years older than I am.....
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 May 2012):
 I'm 52 and my fiance is 38...
you need to be honest
age after a certain point does not matter
but with no desire to meet what is going on here?
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A
female
reader, yelarose12 +, writes (5 May 2012):
yelarose12 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYour both right ,I just dont know how i'm gonna do this .I know i'll lose him and it's gonna hurt so bad .But I know what i did was so wrong .Oh how I wish it was'nt this way .We really do love each other .I hate going a day without talking to him and he feels the same about me.Anyway I know i have to do the right thing .There is way to much age differance between us 18 yrs is alot .I want to thank you for your kindness and for you takeing the time to care enough to help me.
Thank you so very much.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2012): If u have no interest in seeing him what's the point of ruining a good thing? If u guy plan on meeting up then I would tell him the truth but I think maybe u should find someone elseor keep dating if u want someone in ur life I don't think age matters now a days ppl are dating younger and younger or older so honesty is best or leave it be an online relationship and date around best luck 2 u
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A
female
reader, yelarose12 +, writes (5 May 2012):
yelarose12 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe is 40 .
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (5 May 2012):
 What kind of age gap are we talking here?
Yep it was a bit foolish but the internet often doesn't feel real and people get carried away.
You are going to have to fess up eventually and depending on his reaction, maybe just chalk this one up to experience.
He may be dissapointed and upset but he will get over it and it would be far worse to let things continue and let him get in deeper.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 May 2012):
 I think you need to be honest to him and yourself. You feel that you love this man but you have not even met him, you are in love with the character on the internet, but things in real life might be a lot different than what you would think. I know that it is hard to come back from a lie but you need to be honest with him and tell him your age, yes you might lose him, but honesty is the best policy, just explain to him why you lied and take it from there. Good luck.
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