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It's killing me because he expects me to spend time with him 24/7 he is smothering me.

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Question - (13 July 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 14 July 2007)
A female South Africa age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Hi, I have recently started dating a real nice peaceful guy, at first I thought the fact that he has no friends and hates going out to places would make life easier for me, but now it's killing me because he expects me to spend time with him 24/7 he is smothering me. I have lost many friends and can't remember the last time I had time for myself.

Please help

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A male reader, DJ8433 United States +, writes (14 July 2007):

DJ8433 agony auntI am very much a stay at home male, I consider myself more of a thinker and people watcher. I do like to spend a lot of time with my significant other. I think that when you're in a relationship with someone that you love, you want to spend time with them. It sounds like you may be more attracted to a man that is more outgoing and less "stay at home". By all means, tell him how you feel, give him a chance to make it right for you. If he's wanting a relationship with you, he will compromise to make you happy, and I don't mean begrudgingly compromise. Only he will change if he wants to. If he's not the right one for you, move on, life's too short to be unhappy.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007):

Try to get him to go out more and mix with your friends. Try to make more new friends who are couples. If you set up these scenarios and he doesn't make an effort then I agree get away from this person. It might not be that he is a bad person, it's just he is not like you and eventually it will make you miserable because he will continually make you feel guilty for not spending time with him.

Good luck

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A female reader, LynstHolin United States +, writes (13 July 2007):

Run. Run. Run away. Run fast. He is an emotional black hole, and possibly an abuser (they like to isolate you from friends and family before they begin the abuse). Whatever you give him, it will never be enough.

RUN!!!!!!

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