A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been going out for 2 years. I know he’s the one because we click. Yesterday he took me to the lake and we had a picnic. He told me I stole his heart and he always wants me to keep it. He is just about the nicest guy I have ever dated and I never want him to get hurt. I love him to pieces. The only thing is we live 30min away from each other and can only get together twice a week. It makes it alil hard but we hang in and call each other when we can. The thing is though that when were together I know everything’s perfect and that I feel closer to him. When were together for that day we click and the day flies bye because we don’t even notice time? But when I get home and im without him I start questioning our relationship and if I want to spend my life with him. Its so easy to know that I want to be with him and take care of him forever when he’s in my arms but when I don’t see him for a couple days I start losing site of how it feels to be with him. We never fight unless a text message gets interpreted wrong but we never fight when we are together. I just don’t know why each time we are apart I feel differently and questioning our love? Im more certain when we are together and snuggling. I hope that when we move in I will feel more certain but I have 5 more years of being together to decide.
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, MindOfaMan +, writes (27 November 2017):
My girlfriend and i are on 3 years and have the same issue. What ended up happening in your relationship of you dont mind me asking?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2012): Listen to your doubts, they are there for a reason in your subconscious while the conscious mind can be easily distracted and controlled.
your doubts could be telling you that there are some serious issues with him or the relationship.
or it could be that there's some issues with you like maybe an underlying insecurity that 'needs' constant attention to be stable.
whatever the cause for your doubts, you should face them and explore them, because I'm quite sure they are symptoms of something deeper. don't just distract yourself with how "good" you feel when you are with him in person.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2012): "It's great when we're together, but when we're apart I question the relationship"No substance to your relationship. When you're together he pays attention to you, compliments and flatters you, tells you what you want to hear, and provides physical contact and affection. Any guy can do that for you when you're together, there's nothing special about him; that's exactly why you question the relationship when you're apart, because there is nothing special about HIM. Easy to get caught up in the moment and dream about a future with any guy when he's in your arms, you should know why you want to be with HIM when you are apart, that's when you should be missing his unique qualities that make him special. You describe time together as standard romantic fantasies with generic nice guy. He's not the one because "we click" when you're together, that is not basis for a relationship, he should be the one because he's "the one" when you're apart. That is obviously not the case, suspect perhaps your boyfriend filling previous voids of male attention and affection in your life, which is you "click" when together but question relationship when apart.
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (26 May 2012):
 Long distance can be hard to deal with in any relationship. but half an hour away from each other really is not that much of a distance, is there no way that you can both try and meet up more? Are there no buses that can allow you to meet up more?
Some people are not good at handling distance, but if it makes you feel this way and there are no plans for another 5 years on things changing then I am not sure if you will be able to cope with the distance. You need to talk to him and tell him how you feel and see what you can both do. If after only a couple of days you forget how it feels to be with him, then maybe he is not the right man for you after all.
...............................
A
male
reader, Charter114 +, writes (25 May 2012):
I understand what you mean when you say you don't get to see each other often, as I've been there many times before. All I can tell you is that your feelings will change every day. One day you'll want to be with him the entire day, the next it's no big deal if he texts you. If it's not that way yet, then your still in what I've heard called the "honeymoon stage". That's the part where your feelings and passion are the strongest.As far as questioning the relationship goes, think on this: Do you trust him?Typically I've discovered that when people doubt their relationships, and really start to talk it over with their significant other, there are underlying problems. Things that they didn't even notice until they sat down and talked to them.if you trust him, then hold on to that feeling of being with him as long as you can, even if you can't see him. Love is the key to happiness in any relationship. I just wish more people could read this advice and take it. There'd be less heartbreak and sadness in the world.
...............................
|
