A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey all im really annoyed and i need some calming down/advice.Me and my ex boyfriend were with each other for just over a year and split over a year ago. I got with my new partner 5 months ago after speaking with him for 2 months before that, it was pretty much love at first sight, and i know that sounds stupid as im only 19 but it was, i fell for him hard and fast and the same for him, and weve got on amazingly since.Well i live in a small village where theres only two local pubs in walking distance and there next door to each other. I work in one and my ex works in another.So me and my boyfriend went for an evening walk with the puppy and on our way home we stopped into the local pub ( the oub my ex works in) purely because it had a beer garden so the puppy could stay with us. We ate our food and left within an hour.Then the next day my best friend (who works in he same pub as my ex, can you see how small the village is now. Everybody no's everyone) came down to my house and told me that all the staff up there had been saying i was disrespectful, out of order and in the wrong for going for food in the pub, and how i had obviously gone there hoping to see my ex boyfriend. ( My ex boyfriend wasnt even working that night!)Im really hurt by this as i know most of the staff and i know that there very bitchy girls but ive always been lovely to them and they have always been decent to me. That pubs part of my life, we have had my mums 40th birthday partys in there, evening meals, boxing day meals, family get togethers. That pub was my local way before my ex boyfriend even started working there, i got him the job in the pub aswell!Now i feel awkward going there and i dont know whether to say anything to them, what do you think? We split a year ago now, and ive moved on, we're on okay terms with each other and he still texts me sometimes to ask to borrow something or for my opinion on things. So surely if he can eat in the pub i work in and he can text me asking to borrow my stuff surely i can eat in their pub? its so childish.
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (13 June 2010):
 Don't feel bad, don't feel annoyed, and don't think about it any more. It's not about you- it's environmentsl. No disrespect meant , but in your lovely British village they obviously have too much time on their hands and a big lack of distractions.
That's why Miss Marple ( the spinster/investigator in Agata Christie's books ) could always figure out so fast who was the murderer. She just had to walk around St.Mary's Mead and talk to people and everybody was more than happy to wag their tongues and spill the beans about their neighbours,whose movements of course had not passed unnoticed.
In a big city that could never have happened, you could have gone to eat in your ex's workplace with a troupe of dancers,dwarfs and alligators and nobody would have taken any notice.
Consider what happened the toll you have to pay for the privilege of living in a quiet, traditional,close-knit community.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (13 June 2010):
 The girls are annoying, I give you that. But not much to do, apparently they are bored with the small town life and have nothing else to do but gossip and make up rumors. How rude.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2010): yes i think its very childish if you broke up a year ago both moved on & are on good terms then who cares if you have a meal in the same pub that he works at especially if he wasnt even working that night! obviously these peoples lifes arent very interesting so talking about yours gives them a spark dont stress yourself over it get on with what your doing & let them get on with whatever it is they do
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A
female
reader, Jendorset +, writes (13 June 2010):
Tell you ex to put them straight. If i was you i would walk straight up to the bitchy girls and give them a peice of your mind. If they keep it up go to the landlord and tell him/her that in this recession they really should have staff that dont treat regulars like dirt. Although on the other hand you can rise above these pathetic girls because you know the truth. I still wouldnt be able to resist telling them they are idiots and completely wrong.
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