| A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I am 22 years old and my fiance is 24. We have a healthy relationship, sexual and other. I understand it is normal to masterbate, everyone does it. But it hurts my feelings when he does it and lies about it, and covers it up. He never just does it, he always has magazines, videos, etc to help him. By him lying it makes me think that he is cheating on me, or thinking about cheating. Do you think I have anything to worry about? Please Help!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ask Heather +, writes (27 December 2006):
 No, You have Nothing to worry about! He`s engaged to YOU, and it`s YOU he wants. All guys masturbate, it`s a fact of life. The secrecy and denial most probably stem from earlier on in life, he was probably told it`s wrong/naughty/shamefull etc. As long as it dosn`t replace the sex life you enjoy together, it`s nothing to worry about! Please push this issue to one side; and concentrate on the REAL issue.. You and your man, engaged to be married, In love with each other (as you both are), and just enjoy each other. Please send me some wedding snaps! Kind Regards, Heather.
A
female
reader, pica +, writes (27 December 2006):
I don't understand why you expect to be told about it anyway. I'm guessing he covers up because he's embarrassed about having to talk to you about it - engaged or not, you really don't need to know about it. I think the magazines & videos are a separate issue and there are enough porn threads on this site already.
Is it the porn that bothers you, or just him masturbating? Cheating is worlds away from this surely .. I think the only thing to worry about is your own paranoia, sorry.
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A
female
reader, lena +, writes (27 December 2006):
 no i don't think you have anything to worry about. he might be embarrassed of the fact that he mastrubates. if he has these videos take them off him and say watch me instead get more kinky in the bedroom he may then forget about his videos and magz and want more of you! i don't think it is a sign of cheating because if he was going to cheat he would be some where else with another woman.
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