A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello aunts and unclesSo my bf and myself have been together about 2 years. He is very active on social media. Always liking womens pics. For some reason it does bother me I think because he has cheated in the past and I've asked him nicely if he could look at the pics but not have to hit like all the time. He feels I'm over reacting. Am I over reacting? Its correct I do not trust him 100 percent yet. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, EmmyApple +, writes (16 October 2021):
I agree with the previous comment. My husband loves to look at pictures and videos of scantily clad or naked woman. He does it every day. He follows hundreds of models on Instagram and YouTube. Especially girls who post lots of bikini videos. He loves bikini videos and he follows so many on YouTube.
At first I felt really insecure because I’m overweight… but the girls he watches are very fit and toned.
But guess what? We still have a great sex life. He is as passionate about my body as ever.
He just has a huge sex drive and it’s a lot more than what I can satisfy. I try to give him pleasure on a regular basis but there are a lot of nights I’m too tired. And every time, he will start looking at women on his phone and rubbing himself after he thinks I’ve fallen asleep.
The first times I noticed him doing that next to me I felt upset. But I’ve learned that it’s selfish and unhealthy for me to expect that I’m the only woman he will ever look at. Men get pleasure from looking at women’s bodies and that is natural and it’s healthy because it provides him with an outlet for his sex drive so he can still get his needs met when I can’t do it for him.
Embrace it. Our is rule: He can follow anyone he wants on social media and he can look at any woman he wants to… as long as he doesn’t chat with them.
Liking their posts? I don’t see a problem with that.
If he enjoys looking at them why not give a like?
You have to just accept that men love to look at women’s bodies. And that is natural and healthy.
A
female
reader, Dr. Julia +, writes (10 September 2021):
 I'm not really interested in looking at other men, but my BF loves to look at other women, especially scantily clad or even naked. He's a guy, and it's OK with me as long as the "look but don't touch" rule stays in place!
You have to craft your own path, but my approach was to actually take an interest in what he likes. They do nothing for me - other than seeing him getting all excited. You may be surprised where that could ultimately go. Not only has our sex life gotten better, but I think we're even closer for it.
Good luck !
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2021): I'm the OP
These women are apparently his friends that I have never met. They have also added me so when he likes their pics I see it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 September 2021):
 So he is liking other women's pictures online (which I get, it's a bit sleazy for a guy with a GF) but YOU apparently go through his social media to NOTICE all these likes?
Honey, get off social media or STOP following him or checking his social media.
Social media is 90% marketing. People are selling lies. Whether that is distorted and curated snippets of their lives, ALTERED and photoshopped pictures, or whatever lame MLM they are trying to sell.
If social media is affecting your relationship a lot, maybe step away from it for a while.
As for you not trusting him 100% after 2 years, I'd say that doesn't seem totally bad. I don't think you HAVE to trust him 100% - but you have to TRUST that he knows how to behave, that his values align with yours, and that his morals are similar to yours.
Liking pictures means what? Exactly?
And WHO's pictures are these? Are they friends' pictures? Exes? Some influencers' pictures? Some online chick trying to get likes and followers by posting provocative pictures?
HIM liking a picture means what? That his next step will be trying to cheat? Start something behind your back?
If that is what you think, maybe HE isn't the guy for you. Because you can't control your BF, you can't control what he does, feel or think. you are not his mommy. If he BY NOW doesn't know that his actions can affect his relationship, maybe he is too dense to date?
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (9 September 2021):
 I think that the problem is he has cheated in the past so there is always going to be an element of mistrust. I think had he not cheated in the past you would not be here on DC concerned about him liking pics.
Trust is one of the most important contributing factors that bind a relationship together, once the trust barrier has been broken the damage is more often than not irreparble. The damage is a lack of trust with the person that was cheated on, wondering who they are texting, on the phone to, who they are with when they are out, and these feelings are unhealthy.
It may be all innocent him liking these pictures, but its a big deal to you because you don't trust him.
I think you either try to forget that he was unfaithful to you in the hope that he will never do it again.
Or if you are going to go on with the mistrust, then maybe its time to call it a day and walk away from this relationship.
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