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Is this trainer being friendly or flirting?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Crushes, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 March 2019) 1 Answers - (Newest, 20 March 2019)
A female Australia age 26-29, *Tzimisce. writes:

I hired a female personal trainer to help me achieve my weight loss goals, and she is co-workers with another personal trainer who is male. I see him around often and a couple of times he has said hi to me, and when he was getting his client on the treadmill next to me he leaned over towards my face (his shoulder was on mine) and said how are you? Smiling.

Then today, I was with my personal trainer and he was asking her if she was using something that I was near and I stopped my exercise so he could get it. But he said "Oh don't stop your set, just keep going" and wrapped his hand around my waist briefly and proceeded to pick up the equipment. My personal trainer looks abit concerned and confused when he done that and I didn't know what to think.

Around the gym his usually pretty friendly, easy-going and nice to everyone. Extremely social, but I've haven't caught him with his hands on anyone, other than me lol. Am I overreacting?

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (20 March 2019):

CindyCares agony aunt Probably yes. As you say, he is friendly, easy-going and nice to everybody. You haven't caught him with his hands on anyone but you yet, but this does not means that it never happens. You spend much less time than he does at the gym, plus you aren't ( I hope :) closely following his movements all the time you are there.

Moreover, you perceived it as if he went out of his way to touch your waist,- but perhaps he just did not go out of his way not to touch it ? Since the equipment he needed was close to you and your trainer was there too, and often in a gym there are not tons of space between a machine and the next, and at certain times it gets pretty crowded … Personal trainers are used to touch bodies, to demonstrate stuff, it's part of their job, so often they are a bit casual about personal space .

Keep in mind , though , that even if he WAS intentionally touchy- feely and flirtatious, you should not read too much into that, it may not mean what you think it means,

( unless he should crank it up a lot ). It's sort of in their job description too . It's like bartenders : they have to keep people coming to their venue , and a bit of flirting can work well for that. In a gym, they have to give some extra motivation for ladies to spend lots of money into something that they would not be so thrilled of doing in the first place. Not everybody is a gym rat , you know ?, or a fitness enthusiast. For many people ( me ! me ! raises her hand and waves it ) it's sort of a drag, and of course if the atmosphere is fun and congenial it will be less of a drag, and a little flirting may help in this sense.

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