A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid.I met my boyfriend October 2006 and I moved in with him January 2007. When we met he told me he was self employed and a few months into this relationship I noticed he was struggling financially. At times he asks me borrow him money to pay rent and he has never paid me back. I'm the one buying groceries and cosmetics for both of us. I once borrowed him R800 he said was owing a friend, the following day I searched his wallet only to find that he had half of the money I gave him. Since then I've been unhappy and these days we fight a lot. He comes home late and drunk and tells me it's friends that buy him drinks. Is this relationship healthy?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): Hunny
leave his sorry arse thats my advise a.s.a.p he is taking the piss love simple as that YOU TAKE CARE OF YOU LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (3 March 2008):
 Do not believe any sob stories.
He is most probably lying and cheating you of your money.
It is your hard earned money and do not give away like that.
Don't be a fool or a sucker!
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (3 March 2008):
You need to ask yourself , "What is in this relationship for you ?'
Do you enjoy any benefits?
Don't be like a door mat!
It is probably your money and he spends on his buddies.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDear Cupid.
All the answers i got from the readers were so true and excellent and this is exactly what my younger has been telling me that this guy is using me. Through the readers' answers I can clearly what type of a person he is, although i didn't want to admit that. I am in the process of getting my own accomodation.
Thanks a lot, i feel much better now.
Prim.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2008): You need to ask this question? come on you are a bright and intelligent woman, the answer stands out a mile. He is no good for you and it is not healthy, you will end up ill through all of this. Take your self off, or boot him out but do not continue like this. My second bloke was exactly the same. All my savings went on bailing him out and we still ended up to our necks in shit. Dont stay or you will look back on a wasted life.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (3 March 2008):
 Hi
No its not healthy. He's using you. If he's self employed and hasn't got enough work, he needs to get off his arse and find another job.
I had an ex that was self employed and basically work shy. I lent him thousands which he was supposed to pay back within 2 weeks. He couldn't which wasn't completely his fault, but, we split and i'm now going through small claims to get it back. And mark my words, i will get it back. But if i was only 800 down and a few bits and bobs here and there, i would get out now if i was you and let him sort himself out.
You will end up in debt because of him eventually.
Good luck.
C xxxxx
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