A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I was adopted at the age of 6, and met my biological family at the age of 21. Since then, I have said goodbye to most of them except my second cousin, who I will call, "Jane." I moved away from her in 2003, found her again in 2007. Since then, I have seen her a few times, and have began to fall madly in love with her. She has invited me to touch her in places, I shouldn't. Like, this past summer, while sitting on the couch at her gradmothers house, she had her hand and arm resting between my legs. While my arm was between hers. She invited me to touch her bare legs, and put my hand on them, resting my arm to where my hand was at her crotch. She hugs me every time she sees me. She laid down on the couch to watch tv, and invited me to use her crotch as a pillow. She constantly flirts with me. She kisses me on the lips at hello and goodbye. It's not a quick hello or goodbye kiss either. She has invited me to come spend the weekend at her house sometime. Is this a normal behavior? Or should I begin to ignore it? More importantly, does this mean she likes me in the capacity that I like her, and should I tell her of my feelings for her?
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female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (4 March 2008):
 If you both have feelings for one another then there is absolutely nothing to stop you dating. Your behaviour is totally normal, she certainly seems to have feelings for you too. I wish you both every happiness.
~Eve~
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): I don't know what the law is in the States but in Britain it's perfectly ok to have a relationship with your second cousin. My sister had a fling with our first cousin and I have to say it was a complete disaster. Our aunt sent her a very nasty letter saying how could she take advantage of her poor son like that and that she no longer trusted her.
I'd weigh up the pros and cons before starting anything. If you feel that the family would be upset, take things slowly. You need to find out if she actually wants a relationship or just a fling. Time will tell.
All the best
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): Hi Hunny
Im adopted not that anything like this has happened to me I just thought Id chuck that in so you no I understand so you have feeling for her, And your pretty sure she has feelings for you. Apparently some parts of america frown upon this but for most of europe its not a problem otherwise alot of history would not have happened anywho back to your problem hunny it all depends on how you really feel. im sending you a link that may help and then it may make you feel completely different we only have this lifetime to learn alot so hunny Its up to you in my eyes if you want to be happy,
http://www.cousincouples.com/info/facts.shtml
No one has the right to judge you hunny and love comes in so many different ways GOOD LUCK HUNNY WITH LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): Firstly she is your second cousin so there is no legal issues with starting up a relationship if you wanted to. Also, you don't know each other as normal cousins would so that takes the sort of creepiness out of it, like if you had ran round together when you were in nappies and shared a bath as toddler - having sex, to me would then be wierd.
If you are in love with her, I think her actions clearly say that she feels the same way. Where would be the harm in seeing where it goes? Or are you afraid of upsetting your biological family? If that is the case you will need to decide whos happiness is most important.
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